Stories Collected While Living in France

French la Vie

Motherhood

Anais1

French Husband's youngest cousin, Anais. Text and Photo, by Corey Amaro

Anais and I were walking down the street to the park, when my neighbor, an older woman, came out of her house to greet us. "Bonjour," she gave in an overly cheerful voice, "What a beautiful little girl you have with you. Tell me, is she your grand-daughter, or is she your great grand-daughter?"

The instant those words came out of her mouth, I took an imaginary step back, and thought to myself;
"GREAT GRAND-DAUGHTER!" At the same time I did the math, calculating if it were even possible? Though the bottom line is, the reality of my genetic makeup. I look older than I am, and it is not easy to hear people think it out loud.

I gotta get over this fact.
I gotta shake it off with it doesn't matter how old I look, what matters is how I live my days.

Nevertheless, when my neighbor asked me if Anais (my French Husband's cousin) was my grand daughter or my great daughter, I should have laughed and said, "No, she is my little cousin." Instead of taking it personally as an insult to my looks.

Nevertheless, when I come face to face with God, and everyone is asking him serious, thoughtful questions, seeking answers and guidance, and trying to come to terms with What is life all about? Why do people suffer? etc.etc. I am going to ask:

"Did you really think it was necessary to give me short legs, a big nose and a double chin?"

At the end of the day we are all the inner child, the thinker, the joker, the mother, the lover, the giver and the old wise woman rolled up as one.

Happy Mother's Day everyone.

Comments

61 responses to “Motherhood”

  1. KJ

    After hitting mental pause, my body has begun to change rapidly. It’s amazing how preserving baby making hormones are. So, I too am experiencing much of what you are. At 51, my youngest son is 9. I keep wondering when someone will ask me if I am his Grandmother. I’m certainly old enough. However, I think the lady who asked you whether you are a Great Grandmother– needs stronger lenses. You nor I look that old.
    Happy Mother’s Day!
    KJ

    Reply
  2. Kim

    Oh I’m right there with you, sister. I resonate with your words to God.
    But I think you’re quite beautiful and — oh so talented.
    My husband is 53 and he looks much older than his years. People ALWYAS think his little boy is his grandson.
    Happy Mother’s Day!!! Big hugs.
    Kim

    Reply
  3. Julie

    You should of told her she was your ‘daughter’!!!… maybe she’s just a little green with envy. Afterall, you have a beautiful home, beautiful family and this beautiful blog which by the way has entertained me for many hours. ps I have some words for God also.

    Reply
  4. Linda@Lime in the Coconut

    Awww. You are so right…it’s how you lived your life. And how they loved you that matters!

    Reply
  5. rosa

    Your neighbour was just unfair, and did it on purpose. Don’t tell me your neighbours don’t know you have teenager children and NO children from previous marriages… you live in a village, after all, not in a big city where people don’t know each other…

    Reply
  6. Vicki

    Happy Mothers Day Corey!!! You are one of the most beautiful people I know both inside and out!!! At 53 my face is starting to look like a road map or connect the dots but it is better than… I just keep living my story!!! I am sure I will look like a great grandmother by the time I am a grandmother.

    Reply
  7. Candy

    When I was a kid everyone always asked my dad if I was his granddaughter. Today he’s 93 and looks remarkably like he did when I was a kid. I’ll take his genes anyday. You’re beautiful, Corey, inside and out. Happy Mother’s Day to you.

    Reply
  8. Jend’isère

    In France there are now more women over 40 than under 20 giving birth. So Anais could be your own daughter as well!

    Reply
  9. Jeanette M.

    I am going to ask him why in my 30’s I need to jump 5 dress sizes? Oh, an where he has been storing my memory.
    You are lovely by the way and how lucky we will all be if we live long enough to know our great grand-children.

    Reply
  10. Sheala

    Happy Mother’s Day Beautiful Corey~
    You do NOT look like a great grandmother! You are a lovely, vibrant, passionate woman. Besides… what could be wrong with looking like a Nana? I do!
    Love you, enjoy your day.
    PS~ check out the email I sent you

    Reply
  11. Isabel ~ Maison Douce

    Happy mother’s day to you, Corey!! I get asked at thrift stores if I am using a senior citizen discount, and it always makes me wonder!!
    Isabel

    Reply
  12. Berlin

    It’s not how you look, it’s how you feel 🙂
    May you have a lovely Mother’s Day…

    Reply
  13. molly

    people ask silly questions sometimes!i always say God chose me to be the chubby girl for now!have a great mothers day!

    Reply
  14. Mo’a

    What nerve!!! You are young and beautiful, and create beauty all around you. From the photos I have seen of you, I cannot imagine what she was thinking…she was just plain rude.
    There is a way to get rid of or diminish a double chin…I have done it through the Facercise program. Here is a link and there are many more.
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UiqMYLoFMF4
    Happy Mother’s Day sweet Corey.

    Reply
  15. Billie

    I just spent a little time, roaming backwards through your photos… remember the little brown boots?? Definitely not boots of an old lady…
    Oh, and the photo shoot in the newly redecorated bath? With the champagne? And a handsome french husband??? And the scads of lace and ribbons and romantacism on almost each page??
    I think you are one of the most beautiful women I have ever (sort of) known. Are you Paris Hilton? (No, thank God) or Heidi Klum or Giselle or Bridgette Bardot! But you are the absolute perfect Corey Amaro! I am just so happy about that! 😀

    Reply
  16. Clarice

    Happy mothers day Corey,
    when I see pictures of myself, I do not even know who that old woman is. I can see none of me at all. It is really shocking. xoxoxo Clarice

    Reply
  17. Regina Clare Jane

    Oh, Corey- you are so beautiful inside and out!
    Happy Mother’s Day, my friend.
    <3

    Reply
  18. Beverly

    Happy Mothers Day Corey!
    From one “grandmother” to another! I think you’re beautiful!

    Reply
  19. Diogenes

    Dear Corey,
    I’ve seen many pictures of you on your blog during the time I’ve been reading it. The woman I see in them is very attractive and vibrant. But I understand the way you think. You are an artist at heart, so you look at everything in the world with a critical eye, especially yourself. I am the same way. With a background in art and architecture, I look at everything with a very critical, analytical eye, especially myself.
    I can bet, from my own personal experience, that others do not ever see you the way you see yourself. For example, if you scrutinize Helen Mirren’s face, you will find that she has quite a big nose and a pointed chin. Yet most people see her as very beautiful. And as for age, when anyone gets to know your wonderful personality, they’ll instantly subtract 20 years.
    Us “sensitive types” are always hardest on ourselves. 🙂

    Reply
  20. Star

    Happy Mother’s Day, Corey!

    Reply
  21. Julie Ann Evins

    Guaranteed to take the shine off mothers day. Your neighbour should be referred to the optician or perhaps a late stint at a Swiss finishing school non ? ! Jx

    Reply
  22. Ann

    Happy Mother’s Day, Corey! The only thing to remember is that babies are show stoppers.
    Once I was visiting my sister and she was taking care of a friend’s baby. She wanted to go to a store so off we went. Then sis wanted to roam about the store and left me with the baby (who was a stranger to me). Three old women stopped and complimented how beautiful the baby was and asked if it was a girl or boy. I honestly didn’t know and the women looked at me so strange and walked off. I’m sure they thought I was crazy.
    Laugh at these silly comments it’s nothing personal unless we make it so. Know who you are and onward. Any negative comments I take as compliments. So if you looked grandmotherly that’s a compliment. Grandmothers are all about love. So there. A compliment.
    Ann

    Reply
  23. Alina

    The way I avoid the aging process: look in the mirror as little as possible and be photographed even less! If I had to constantly look at what others see I would never leave my house. That is not your case. You glow, girl!
    Happy Mother’s Day!

    Reply
  24. Niki Weippert

    People just don’t think before they speak. I had someone ask me if my husband was my father! I loved it! He’s only 4 yrs. older than I am. Made me feel young, but I don’t think it did much for him. Also, sometimes with older people what ever pops into there heads comes out of their mouths. I can tell you are a beautiful, vibrant person from your writing. Happy Mother’s Day, Corey!

    Reply
  25. Merisi

    That neighbor of yours must have had a little drink before she got out of the house to utter such stupidities! What is it her affair anyway whose child this is? *sternlook*
    Corey, I always thought you look like such a vibrant warm human being and never ever did it cross my little mind that you’d look even a day older than you actually are.
    Next time you see your lovely neighbor, give her a hug and tell her that a friend of yours wants you to buy her a new attitude on life!
    Happy Mother’s Day, girl!

    Reply
  26. Cookie

    Dearest Corey, When you pass on from this world, people will talk of how much you were loved…..not of how old you looked. Hope you had the loveliest Mothers Day. Hugssss

    Reply
  27. martina

    I got a senior discount at the plant nursery recently, even though I’m only 8 months older than you. Hey, I have my pride but a discount is a discount-especially at a place with ususally high prices.

    Reply
  28. amy billstrom

    Thanks for your post. I appreciate you sharing those humbling moments – ‘though I suspect that woman was the one feeling old that day.
    I was with my daughter once at our local produce market where the staff are lovely to children (sometimes to adults as well.) We stood at the register and the cashier told my daughter, “You have beautiful eyes.” My daughter said, “Thank you.” The cashier glanced at me and back at my daughter, then asked, “She looks like her father?”
    I laughed out loud and said, “She certainly does!” Then I added, “My son looks like me and he’s ADORABLE.”

    Reply
  29. anonymous

    Moles, chin hair from one ancestor, flat feet, sensitive emotions from others. But I also inherited a good sense of humor, intelligence and nice hair too. What you really call mixed blessings.
    No way do you look old enough to be a great grandma-your neighbor wasn’t thinking before she spoke.

    Reply
  30. Kit

    Happy Mother’s Day. She’s gorgeous and so are you and when you do get round to being a grandmother I’m sure you’ll be the most glamorous one around – but I hope it’s not too soon!!
    My children find the idea of me being a grandmother hilarious and we worked out that I could be one if I’d had them earlier and they got married early too… but definitely not a great grandmother – your neighbour needs stronger glasses – she must be getting old herself!

    Reply
  31. Beachy

    Happy Mother’s Day to one of the most beautiful women I know of in Blogland! You have become everyone’s Mother, sister, and best friend with your loving words. =) hugs!

    Reply
  32. Kathie

    There, there, Corey! If it’s any comfort, the famous American country singer Loretta Lynn became a grandmother at age 28 (her daughter emulated her by becoming a mother at 14).
    Wishing you a Happy Mother’s Day, as well as a big Thank You for your generosity in allowing me to excerpt two of your postings on my website (adding it this coming week), Kathie.

    Reply
  33. michelleb.

    At first I wondered if this is the new neighbor who throws their table scraps on your roof for the cats…sounds like something that would come from the same type of person. However, from seeing you in pictures I think you are beautiful.
    (And on a completely different note I love to see how children are dressed in other countries. Tell me, does Anais’s shoes have little wedge heels or are they boots?)
    happy Mother’s Day!

    Reply
  34. Ulla

    Oh sweetie… no matter what people say, you are young at heart, and that my dear is all that matters!
    Kisses and HAPPY MOTHERS DAY!
    Ulla

    Reply
  35. Elaine

    Corey, we’ve all seen you in your bath and you certainly don’t have the body of a grandmother! You’re beautiful inside and out! I love you the way you are.

    Reply
  36. Janet

    Happy Mother’s Day Corey. I am a sculptor as you know, http://www.janetcoshow.com, and I spend all my days looking at faces. One thing I have learned from doing that is that it is hard to find a face that isn’t full of beauty because faces display what the heart cannot display on its own. Your heart is a a good and generous one and your face shows it. You are beautiful. Have a beautiful Mother’s Day.

    Reply
  37. Ellen

    Corey, I think you are lovely. Your photos and writing are something I look forward to every day. You are beautiful inside and out! Have a blessed Mother’s Day!
    Ellen

    Reply
  38. carol

    God only cares about our hearts, not the package that holds it.
    That said, French husband must like “big noses, short legs and double chins” just fine my dear!!
    As for your neigbor, she is either very dumb or very rude.

    Reply
  39. Alena

    Happy mothers day to one of the most beautiful women i know- Corey!

    Reply
  40. Ana

    Dearest Corey, it was the wisdom that she saw. the way you were with Anais, the strong sense of self and the inner calm of only one who is blessed with the serenity of a life lived well and with love. you have wisdom beyond your years and that is why she said those words. This shines through in your words everyday and the outside you, is only evident after they have had experience of your wise soul and then the beauty of shines through inside and out and they are blinded by your magnificence and they then see the real beauty of in its entirety!
    Ana

    Reply
  41. Tammy

    Happy Mothers Day to you Corey. A woman who has touched so many with her beautiful thoughts and love.
    PS I have always thought of age as just a number because really we can be however old we want…some of us never grow up…Now that is fun

    Reply
  42. Denise Moulun-Pasek

    Dear Corey,
    All I’ve seen so far is a woman full of passion for life, a lust for antiques and a very good sense of humour.
    Yeh Corey! From a woman with short legs, a big nose a double chin and quite a few pounds heavier than you!
    Bonne fête des mères.
    D.

    Reply
  43. Joanny

    Corey
    Oh the words that fly out of our mouths, sometimes we know them to be hurtful, other times it was just a stupid & thoughtless comment. A lady the other day commented to me that she will no longer wear her favorite jumper, someone asked her how far along was she ? 6 -7 months? This sweet lady is tall & slender and does not even look close to being overweight let along pregnant — go figure? All on account of a loose fitting dress.
    The point being you are much too hard on yourself, you are a attractive woman even though I have not meant you in person, you bring out the best in people with your daily blogging and beautifully written words, I wish I had a bit of your charm, style and great smile.
    If it is the color of your hair going gray young that fools people at first glance & truly bothers you try light brown tones, blond hair sometimes does not compliment certain skin tones, and maybe to close to white & grays. I tried it once and looked so pale, people would ask me if I were well…was I sick lately, personally I thought your natural gray hair was attractive and you looked positively ‘chic’
    Happy Mother’s Day
    Joanny

    Reply
  44. Alexandra

    I don’t know…great grandmother!!! That comment seems a little “MEOOOW” to me. I think she may be seeing green. Maybe grandmother if you had children very young, but GGM?! No way.

    Reply
  45. louise

    Happy mothers day corey Love your blog and cry alot when I read it your dad was special and your mom is the greatest and if you grow old to be like either you will be loved by all not that you’re not already

    Reply
  46. Catherine

    It’s not the outside packaging that is important – it’s what’s on the inside that marks you as a beautiful person.
    Happy Mothers Day Corey.

    Reply
  47. hhb

    ‘Women are born three thousand years old.’
    happy Mother’s Day dear One.

    Reply
  48. Jeni

    The “older” neighbor lady’s eye’s are obviously not what they used to be.. no way you look like a grandmother!
    Happy Mother’s day!

    Reply
  49. Patricia

    What???!!!!!! Your neighbor is either jealous, needs glasses, or just plain rude!!!! I have been reading your blog for a long time and have seen photos of you and even a video you posted. I think you are beautiful and even look younger than your age.
    Happy Mother’s Day – I can tell from your blog you are a GREAT mother!!!!

    Reply
  50. fitty

    age is just a number, looks is not important.. but what we feel in our heart and soul that counts.. happy and young.. that will determine our look & age..
    happy mother’s day Corey..

    Reply
  51. marlis

    happy mother’s day. You so not look old. I’d gladly trade my jowls for a double chin. Isn’t it written somewhere that we all begin to see our mothers in ourselves…

    Reply
  52. julie

    If ya do the math, I guess it is possible that we 51 years olds could be great grandmas….if we got pregnant at 15 and our kid got pregnant at 15 and that kid got pregnant at 15. Maybe this neighbor was a very busy teenager! You do not look old! I think you are quite chic.
    Love,Julie
    @thekitschentable

    Reply
  53. Jend’isère

    Just because you collect antiques, doesn’t mean you are one!

    Reply
  54. Su

    When my Dad was eighty, he told me he still felt eighteen inside…just with more information!
    We are who we are…and having read your blog for sometime, you seem to have fun and enjoy living life…long may you continue with that beauty…

    Reply
  55. Catalina

    Happy Mother’s day Corey!!!! and all mothers!
    you really make me laugh Corey!
    yes, we are always the child…the bodies change but the heart stays still 🙂
    (I’m sure most of the time people see the young brave and so wise to live her life woman-child that you are) Thanks always to share with us

    Reply
  56. Francesca

    Oh please Corey, you have lost your first love, had faith enough to embrace a new one which required a new life in a new country, raised two children, battled cancer and won, has a fantastic sense of humour even surrounded by such grumpy and rude neighbours, and has a blog read by hundreds who like me, admire you for what you are. None of us care about your looks.
    Now, after reading this, tell me: are you still worried about hair colour and double chin? No? Good. 🙂

    Reply
  57. Leslie Garcia

    Dear Corey,
    When I read this post I thought that your neighbor must never have been a mother…and seeing you with such an enchanting child must have made her say something she really knew not to be true.
    I have a friend who said to me when we reconnected after 25 years…”Did you really want to have SO many children?” I have 4! They have all been the JOY of my life…and my friend never experienced having one.
    Wishing you Love always dear Corey!
    Leslie

    Reply
  58. andrea

    Oh no, what did you say to her?!I would have said ,no she’s my little cousin.I get that a lot with my youngest brother.There is a 19 year age difference but he looks a little older and I a little younger so I like to think I don’t look quite old enough to be his mother and yet anytime I take him somewhere(he’s still a teenager) I get-Oh and your son…or he gets:your mother…I just cringe….usually I do correct them!

    Reply
  59. Patty in Kansas

    Fist time to write to you, dear Corey…from Kansas, no less….you are an inspiring, witty, lovely person who lets us all peek in on your wonderful life…the woman who said that to you was mean spirited, and needed her glasses cleaned, perhaps? God bless you with all good things. Keep writing.

    Reply
  60. patricia

    When I was a child in Oklahoma, I asked my mother when we grow up do we still keep the child we were inside of us. My mother, a very practical woman not one to waste time with such nonsense said, “I don’t have a clue what you just asked me.” But now at almost 60, I know. We’re always the same. I am sure God was merely balancing the minor physical imperfections because he spent so much time on your spirit, your heart and your sense of humor. You can tell Him I said so!

    Reply
  61. Shannon

    WOOOW. I can’t believe she asked GREAT grandmother. She has no sense of age at all. Although I do know a couple of actual grandmothers who are my age!!!! That to me is insanity. I’m barely an experienced mother right now.

    Reply

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