The Lover, the Garden, the Next Door Neighbor and Fig Jam

old fashion roses
After the last fig jam jar was sealed I raised my gooey jam filled spoon and shouted out, "This is for you Mr. Porte!"

You see Mr. Porte was my next door neighbor, the incredible gardener, generous smile, nearly ninety year old… He taught me how to grow a garden. 

One day, late afternoon he came to my house, like he had done so many times before. I greeted him with the familiar French greeting of two kisses, opening the front door wide I asked him to come on in. As if shy he took two steps back, looking over his shoulder towards his home, "I cannot," he said.

"Of course you can!" I teased, pulling at his shirt sleeve, "What do you have something urgent to do?" He cast his eyes down, shook his head, then again stepped back. I swallowed my smile, leaned forward worried, afraid to ask why but I did anyway, "What's wrong?"

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Mr. Porte blushed when he told me that his wife was jealous of me.

"Me?! What! No? Why?" I searched through the moments we had been together, was it because he helped me in the garden?

He shook his head no, then shrugged, then looked right at me with his sincere blue eyes, "She thinks we are having an affair." As he said it in French and as I did not grasp what he meant, by the French word liaison or maybe because I didn't believe my ears, I said "What?" He leaned his head towards me without moving his feet, in a near whisper translated, "My wife thinks we are lovers, and forbids me to see you alone after this conversation."

"Me? Us? Never again…" I glanced over to my neighbor's house, dumbfounded, realizing this wasn't a joke, that his wife took his strong dirty hands to mean something utterly different than working in the garden.

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We stood by the garden gate… and smiled a smile that speaks volumes when only silence is needed. He said, "I know it is silly, I am sorry if I have embarrassed you, I am embarrassed," then he shook his head, and under his breath I heard him say, "As if you would have an affair with me! Aurevoir Corey." He turned to walk away.

He was hurt. Our gardening friendship was over.

I spoke up, he turned around, "Mr. Porte, if you were a little younger and if I were a little older… perhaps…" But before I could finish my sentence we started to giggle, and with that the energy changed. We knew we cared for each other and would remain friends at a distance.

Scrapbook-detail

Mr. Porte waved his hand at me, as he slowly walked across the street to his house.

I stopped gardening.

Though I still go over to their home to pick cherries and figs.

Mr. Porte loves home made jam. 

________________________________________________

figs

Fig Jam

2 pounds of very ripe figs cut in fourths,

1 1/2 pounds of sugar,

Put the figs in a large heavy pan, add the sugar on top of them,

Cover the pan and let it alone for 24 hours.

Most of the sugar will have melted, turn the heat on very low,

Bring the fig-sugar mixture to a boil, stirring often, turn the heat lower,

When the fig-sugar mixture ripples off the spoon the jam is done,

Grill two handfuls of sliced almonds,

Then add the grilled sliced almonds to the jam, stir until well mixed.

Add the boiling mixture to sterile jars and can.



Comments

55 responses to “The Lover, the Garden, the Next Door Neighbor and Fig Jam”

  1. oh that is such a beautiful and sad story. thank you again.
    xowendy
    ps. figs are favorites here too

  2. Holy moley, Batwoman!

  3. Oh my gosh that is the sweetest thing I have ever heard. Thanks for sharing such a lovely story.

  4. Tender and so sweet Corey. Thanks. (now I kow what they mean about writing a book…)

  5. Tender and so sweet Corey. Thanks. (now I know what they mean about writing a book…)

  6. A sad story from one which should be so beautiful. A friendship spanning decdes difference of age but not minds. I wonder if his wife was a bitter and jealous woman or had she been hurt in the past?

  7. Why not invite them both for a coffee or tea and give them a jar of fig jam to thanks THEIR kindness for letting you pick up the figs?

  8. Why not knock on the Portes door with a jar of fig jam and talk to the wife? Seems so sad that a friendship should be endangered by a misunderstanding!

  9. My heart is breaking for Mr. Porte. Something that brought him joy and a smile (working with you in the garden), and his wife’s jealousy (and his respect for her) rob him of it. That is only a tragedy, not sweet, to me.

  10. Perhaps you need to become his wife’s friend, if she’ll let you. Men & women can be just friends, & I like how you want to be friends with everybody. C’est la vie!!

  11. jend’isère

    Figs were the appropriate choice of fruit you used for your sweet story.

  12. Big hugs my darling
    Feelings are the same all over the world are they not?
    Kisses
    I love you
    Jeanne
    The greatest gift is people loving people and when we do we are but one step from Heaven♥

  13. Such a sweet story!! Hope you have a great trip to Marburger–while in Warrenton, you must go down to Clutter and eat at The Sack Lunch. We arrange our shopping each day to have lunch there–they have the very best sandwiches (usually at least one meatless choice) and their oat cookies are to die for!!! Can’t wait to meet you. . .and yes, I am now searching for a TALL cloche too!!!!! A Corey clone!!! elle

  14. That is such a sweet and sad story. I have a feeling Mr. Porte may have had a shady past with the ladies if his wife is still this jealous.
    Have you ever thought of extending the invite to her as well so she can meet you AND Yann and see that what you have with Mr. Porte is truly a friendship?

  15. That’s a sweet story in more ways than one. I kind of like that he respected his wife’s wishes. That’s very sweet and considerate of him. Sorry about the loss of friendship but better than a loss of marriage, at least I think… 🙂

  16. Julie Ann Evins

    Perfect title – sounds like a book if not a movie ..! What a complicated thing human emotion is. Im liking Mr Porte a lot x

  17. oooooo. but nice story all the same.
    oh and the jam…you made me hungry! ;))

  18. This is what happens when you dance in your garden naked. 🙂

  19. …..arrive at their door, some of those lovely roses wrapped in a scrap of linen, tied with silk ribbon, a jar of fig jam, and thank MADAME Porte for allowing her dear one to help you learn how to be a gardener…..then say you must run as your beloved Yann is waiting for you!
    I made fig jam yesterday, similar recipe but added chopped lemons – like your idea of the almonds and will try it next time…..if I can get my hands on more delicious figs.

  20. Usually your posts make me laugh and smile however, today I was sad. You can tell his friendship means alot to you. Those darn green eyes of “j”. Your jam sounds yummy!!!

  21. What a beautiful heart wrenching story. Shame on his wife for ruining what must have been a very kind and fun relationship. It’s a surprise that you didn’t walk over and whack over the head with your fig jam covered spoon.

  22. I agree that this story could be a wonderful movie…
    I can see it now~since you are aquainted, Angelina could play you and maybe Robert Redford as Mr. Porte?
    Loved the story very heart warming.

  23. your story reminds me of ‘lost in translation’. well written, thanks!

  24. jealousy is just so sad…
    I remember eating fig jam as a child when my grandmother put them up.

  25. oh dear, that poor man! are you allowed to bring him some jam on occasion?

  26. Corey,
    I have been reading to catch up on your posts. You do know that your life is a dream do you not? Thank you for sharing it so freely.

  27. Corey, you handled that situation beautifully. Love the rose pictures.

  28. Such a sweet man. Sweet as jam, that is what he is.
    I remember as a child, making jam with my mom. I hated it and wanted to be out playing with friends. Now I’d consider making jam with a friend playing !!!! Maybe I should do that????? hmmmmmmmmm

  29. I love the fact that love is so alive there! Love is what is behind the story…The fact that love can be shared at any age. Love that is passionate and guarded, love like the intimate joy of an innocence gardening friendship, loving enough to care even if fears are unfounded, loving enough to be honest…there are all sorts of loves, it takes so many forms (even if it gets twisted along the way) And you brought the whole thing together through laughter at the end!
    And aren’t figs a symbol of love? A very sweet story I think – even when it’s sad love, like those roses, climbs in anywhere it can.

  30. Corey,
    I think you handled this bitter/sweet moment with such grace and style!
    It must have been extremely humiliating for him to come over and express his wife’s fears. Your light-hearted response broke the ice, caused a giggle and allowed him a sense of dignity.
    Marilyn (in Dallas)

  31. Another time you made me smile , girl.
    Hope you are getting ready for the big adventure. Don’t forget anything

  32. PLEASE do not stop gardening though, Corey, even if you do not have Mr Porte’s tutelage. You can honour the truth of your friendship with him by continuing what he taught you instead of bringing it down to the level of old Mrs ‘Jellyfish’. Love, love, love figs………

  33. I feel sorry for Mr Porte, but also for his wife who cannot trust her sweet husband after so long..oh well. Mr Porte’s wife has obviously not seen your dear husband or she would realize an affair would be no where in sight! LOL….

  34. Hey Corey, isn’t kinda hard to grill almonds for your fig jam when they keep fallin’ through the grill like that? LOL!
    Seriously, the fig jam recipe sounds delicious, and we have 100s of figs on our hardy-variety trees here in Pennsylvania right now! I assume we can freeze the figs till we’re ready to make jam, right? Thanks.

  35. Kris Grover

    Sweet, and sad, all at the same time!!!

  36. Sometimes Corey, it amazes me but I think God actually speaks through you…I arrived home Friday to find a very nasty note in my mailbox. In it, an anonymous person accused my Dad of having an affair with his sister-in-law. My dad will be 68 on Friday. He is meek and shy and prays some of the most beautiful prayers that you will ever hear. He has had 2 girlfriend. The first one was Lola, and next my mother. My parents have been married for almost 40 years. He helps his sister-in-law mow the grass and tend to her garden…hence the accusation. He also helps my 2 aunts, 2 of the widows from church and my uncle. Using the rational of the writer of the letter…he must be having affairs with all of them as well. Pretty damn energetic for a 68 yr old man with a heart murmer and high blood pressure.
    People are just crazy some times. I worry that the world is forgetting what kindness looks like and therefore they mistake it for something else…

  37. Oh, such a bittersweet story.
    Carolyn

  38. That is such a sweet story, as is the telling.

  39. You should have sent your hunky husband over to her house to deliver the fig jam. Then she would have felt like a fool…!

  40. Sounds to me as though such a bad wife has reason to fear her husband would desire another.
    Sensitively told, Corey. Lovely.

  41. Oh I love fig jam. The last time I had some I was in France. It reminds me of France. I can not wait to try this recipe.

  42. I just had to tell you how you made me laugh so incredible hard and It felt sooo good!! I am talking about the post about “What to do with French Linen and Hemp” :)) Specially after receving a comment like this :
    Well, I´m maybe a bit critical, but I mean your style of writing. Is this real life for you? I´ve been visiting many, many blogs, but sometimes it´s hard to find true life in it. That´s why I stopped blogging. All seems to be so NOT true.
    She is talking about my enthusiasm for old stuff and linen.(!!) I mean, I love Brocante!! And I am so glad you also do 🙂 Then we may laugh and have fun “together”. I also wanted to thank you for all the great storys and images you shared from you days out on the market. It was so much fun to read about! I could feel you joy all the way to Norway where I live.
    Have a great week, don`t you also love this season?
    Hug, Aina

  43. I could smell the fig jam and taste the emotion. Beautifully written.
    Last night at our neighborhood potluck I brought a salad of our homegrown tomatoes and basil with fresh mozzarella cheese but my favorite dish at the party was a platter of sun warmed Camembert cheese surrounded by fresh figs. I didn’t move from that platter for a very long time. Such simplicity. Such joy.

  44. Mr Porte sounds like a very fine man caring so much for his wife’s feelings!

  45. Corey! You vixen you, you you she devil, sex goddess! I told you that you should put on some nice lace bloomers.
    I’m so sorry that you’ve lost your gardening friend and he, you.
    Although I do rather think it’s loving of him to respect his wife’s feelings and wishes.
    Is there no way you can woo and soothe the wife, Corey?
    mmmmm, figs! We had lovely carmelized figs and rosemary honey, with that yummy soft burrata and bread the other night. Tasty tasty tasty!
    Is tomorrow your departure day? Wishing you a great trip!

  46. We recently bought an acreage that was in a particular farm family for the past five decades. A man in his late sixties if not seventies, a member of the previous owner’s family, likes to drive out from time to time and have a look at the old place for its sentimental value. I don’t like his born-again preaching to me, so I said to my mother-in-law “Maybe I’ll tell him that Scott doesn’t want him visiting me when he’s not home.” She laughed and said “That will make his day!”

  47. Oh dear
    I am a little sad too. Beautiful friendship kept at a distance through fear. Well he has left you a legacy with the gardening. I love your rose images .. so so lovely.

  48. That story made me giggle and then about cry! So sad for the friendship and so sad you stopped gardening…

  49. Such a sweet man to love his wife so much and respect her wishes although it is sad that jealousy has taken away your gardening friend. You handled it with such grace and elegance. What a wonderful lesson you have taught us.
    love and hugs

  50. Ellen Cassilly

    Lovely tale. I can’t wait to see you . I have lots of fun things in store.
    E

  51. It’s certainly a compliment to Mr. Porte, that his wife thinks, that at his age, a woman young enough to be his daughter would be interested in having an affair with him.
    How very French!
    P.S. She must know something we don’t. Obviously he still has it.
    ~elaine~

  52. Your blog is like soul music.
    Hugs

  53. Your top photo is so gorgeous!!!
    Do you have photoshop with watercolor/paint daubs.
    Oh my! It would look amazing as a painting.

  54. Ohhhhhh, that’s funny and yet so sad. Poor Mr.Porte. 🙁 Poor you. 🙁 I suppose Mrs.Porte must still feel quite passionate about Mr.Porte. And, well,l imagine your FH will remain a looker well into his 90’s, Corey.

  55. How I wish I could meet you!
    Could you give me lessons?
    I will be in North Carolina, Georgia, Texas and California.
    One month.
    Corey

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