Stories Collected While Living in France

French la Vie

Chelsea and Sacha in California

Hour glass

Photo and text by Corey Amaro:

Those two who flew the nest are feeling the air beneath their wings, as the horizon expands their eyes widen, joy is at hand regardless of the subtle difference of culture. Isn't it true that we see things differently when we are on our own?

Sacha was amazed when he walked into the High School hallway and everyone it seemed knew his name, or knew he was the 'French Boy'. I asked him what were his first thoughts he said:

"Nobody wears tight shirts, let alone birkenstocks. The guys wear baggy shirts and baggy shorts…Mom I need new clothes." I reminded him that he took his bike (which cost a fortune) and that he wanted to be Mr. Godiva.

"Mom, seriously."

He also said, 'It is strange, in France we greet people, not that they don't greet one another here, but in France you kiss cheeks, or shake hands with grownups and kids alike, but here I never know what to do…hug or not to hug… it is weird, I feel like a ping pong ball with my thoughts going back and forth in my head 'should I shake hands, or should I hug, HUG?! or do I stand still…"

"Hug all girls, shake hands with adults, and high five the guys." I offered.

"Mom, seriously."

He also said, "In a small town, everyone seems to know what you are thinking before you think it. They know everything about everyone…."

I added, "Fishbowl. So be good. Be yourself."

Fatima hand

Chelsea is in San Francisco, she loves it. Simply loves it. She is sharing the most perfect apartment with friends (Thanks Allison, MaryKate, Linda, Robin, Diane B., Joan, Diane, Joy, Charee….) the community of cousins, sister in laws, friends who have made her landing safe and sound. School starts next week, I cannot wait to hear about it.

I hope Chelsea and Sacha will let me share their thoughts on the differences they feel between the two cultures. If so I will certainly weave their journey on my blog.

Sacred heart

…. the empty nest do I dare say… that as much as we miss our two, for as often as we catch ourselves thinking about them, as odd as it feels not to have them around and to see food in the fridge, less laundry and gas in the car…. We are rediscovering something… and that something is better than I ever imagined.

The cycle of life, flowing with the current, thankful that the ride is gentle on this part of the stream.

All is good and there is nothing wrong about that.

Comments

46 responses to “Chelsea and Sacha in California”

  1. kelleyn

    What a wonderful opportunity for both of them. At least Sasha won’t have to worry about the number of kisses. That always gets me. How many and in which country?

    Reply
  2. Paulita

    Ahh. You give me hope. But I’m not telling my husband yet. We have four more years before the youngest flies the coop.

    Reply
  3. Laura

    I was waiting for this post! Yes, having your children fly the coop has its benefits.
    The first morning ours were gone…I came down to the kitchen to see my husband making coffee in the nude.
    Shocked, I stammered…”what?…why?…”
    He smiled and replied…”because I can!”
    Enjoy this season of life…
    …all good wishes for Chelsea and Sacha…
    🙂

    Reply
  4. anne

    So not so bad after all!!! 🙂 … I am so pleased that you are rediscovering …. I like that. I need to do that here.
    Sasha will get there .. I am sure, but it just goes to show you the culture difference .. and he noticed it at school. I much prefer the way the French boys dress.. .. Oh and the kissing bit.. I do it here now .. OH they do not like it.

    Reply
  5. Leslie

    Beautifully Said……….

    Reply
  6. Robyn [miss*R]

    if this was facebook, then I would be pressing the ‘like’ button 🙂

    Reply
  7. Vicki

    Ahhhh the cycle of this beautiful life!!! Hope they both enjoy every moment of the next year!!!

    Reply
  8. Jeanne

    Oh how lovely is every post you share
    I am glad your children are doing well and so are you and your darling Hubby
    God bless you all
    Love you

    Reply
  9. Cheryl ~ Casual Cottage Chic

    I had a feeling that you would experience what Mr CCC and I experienced when your only son left home for college…ROMANCE returned! The attention was no longer directed to our son…we now could focus on each other…again! Enjoy and rediscover why you fell in love years ago 😉

    Reply
  10. DanaSmith

    We are packing our last born to head back to school….she will be a Sr. this year. This is the last time we will load the Volvo up with her “stuff” and head 5 hours away to her school and come back to a quiet house. I feel almost as sad as I did that first time we did it 3 years ago. But I keep reminding myself how devastated I would feel if she hadn’t gone to college….how blessed she is for that opportunity. It’s the progression of life and if we’re lucky that road can be a wonderful ride for us too. If you’re lucky when that last one leaves the nest you’ll find yourself right back in that same blissful state you were in before you brought those lives into the world. Seems we both got lucky in that department, Corey.

    Reply
  11. Penny

    So nice to hear that the baby chicks are doing well on their own and that mama and papa are as well. Enjoy this leg of the journey.

    Reply
  12. Rhonda P.

    I didn’t realize your daughter was going to California, as well. They are doing the reverse of their Mom. France to California.
    Do you think they’ll miss France?
    Sacha will be the talk of the town for some time. He is too cute.

    Reply
  13. Everton Terrace

    I think your advice to Sacha was perfect. Shake with adults, high five the boys and by all means, hug the girls. We moved to a small town (from the city) when I was starting high school. It seemed in 1 day everyone knew who I was and I knew nobody. I know exactly what Sacha is talking about. He’s going to love it!

    Reply
  14. naomi

    Loved hearing how the young ones are doing – and glad the transition is going well for you!

    Reply
  15. Joanna

    Rap videos and music may help. The dudes these do a thing with their arm and hand that kind of “click” in mid air without high five-ing…

    Reply
  16. Beachy

    How wonderful that the four of you are enjoying this part of your journey! I almost look forward to an empty nest some day, so hubby and I can go back to dating! 😉

    Reply
  17. Marilyn

    I will look forward to their adventures along with you. How wonderful to rediscover just the two of you.

    Reply
  18. Carol

    This is such a happy post, it’s wonderful to know that everyone is settling in!
    I too hope Chelsea and Sacha will let you share some of their experiences from time to time.

    Reply
  19. Sharon, Morrison Mercantile

    yes…empty nests are the beginning or the end of a long marriage.
    It was so much fun to be free after the last one left, even though I went through your anguish, once I got through the sadness it opened up a whole new world for Dick and I. So sad he had to die before we could really get full steam!
    I am so happy for all of you.

    Reply
  20. Lisa Oceandreamer S.

    You and Yann have done an excellent job with your birds….they left the nest with confidence and ready for a new adventure with wings not flying AWAY from you but flying TOWARDS something new and exciting.

    Reply
  21. Carolyn Mallin

    It is wonderful isn’t it? It’s as it should be.

    Reply
  22. momof5

    Beautifully said and written. I could feel your peace within.

    Reply
  23. LaurieSF

    Note to Sacha. French revolution in Willows. Viva la France. Keep your tight t-shirts.

    Reply
  24. Victoria Ramos

    I am so happy for all concerned. Yes – empty nest can mean the renewing or the ending to a long marriage. My transition has not been as joyful as yours — I hope we can hang on to this bump in the road.
    Tell Sasha the shirts used to be even bigger and shorts even longer and baggier — if he can imagine that.
    xxxooo

    Reply
  25. Jennie

    Corey, I thought Sacha already graduated from high school in France. Isn’t he going to bored in an American high school?
    Jennie

    Reply
  26. Star

    I’m glad things are going well for all of you. Kids adapt easily, and it sounds like you’re adapting better than you expected 🙂

    Reply
  27. Kisten Friis

    Hi Corey
    I have been enjoying your blog for a couple of years now, but usually I don’t comment. I think it’s because I am not a blogger myself. However, I feel now that I have to tell you that I, too, know about falling asleep when I don’t want to. I fall asleep in cars, in trains and in buses, and I can’t help it, no matter how much I try. My husband finds it weird.
    I hope your two wonderful kids will have a great time in California!
    All the best to you,
    Kirsten, Denmark

    Reply
  28. Tamra / The Gilded Barn

    So sweet!

    Reply
  29. Patt

    Empty nest can be so blissful. I still miss my children but now I am not missing my husband. We are happy EN’s just as long as I can talk to our daughters every day.

    Reply
  30. Astrid

    How interesting Corey. My son is experiencing the opposite, after growing up in California, suddenly we move to Peru, and life is soooo different. It’s funny, my son needs to learn to kiss people on one chick to greet them, no longer hand shakes, no longer hugging girls (although kissing girls may not be a bad thing when you are 15)… he attends an American School and he meets people from all over the world. Experiencing a different culture than your own is the best gift that you can give them (I think).

    Reply
  31. Denise Solsrud

    i am so pleased you feel better about the separation. it’s tough,but i believe i said it before, that it feels much better to the parents when they know that at least your kids are happy with the new experience. it is a big part to realize this is a new avenue in life.Bestest,Denise

    Reply
  32. karen

    Another great post, another chance to marvel at your family’s wonderful relationship … please share their thoughts on culture difference if they are willing.. I’de be very interested to see their perspective.

    Reply
  33. cynthia wolff

    Your children are so on their way Corey without any worries. I wish the kids in Willow would follow Sasha’s lead rather than the other way around. I so hate those baggy clothes the kids wear…so not cute. I think cause so many American kids are so overweight this is the only kind of clothing that feels comfortable. Maybe Sasha will start some new trends. He’s going to be getting all the girls attention and they will prefer his “looK’…I hope you can get into your freedom soon with your husband…These will be great days for your togetherness….yahoo.

    Reply
  34. Di

    I am very glad that you are all settling in to new routines and new excitement!

    Reply
  35. Kieren

    Where is Chelsea going to school?
    I’m starting grad school next week at SF State, I can keep an eye out for her, if that’s where she is! (Just what she’d like I’m sure, the spies are everywhere on both your kids! ha!)

    Reply
  36. Jo

    So glad to hear that Chelsea and Sacha are adjusting to life in CA and that you and FH are finding a new rhythm as well. Sacha might be surprised to find that some of the boys may very well begin emulating his style, so he shouldn’t dispose of those tight shirts just yet.

    Reply
  37. Jackie

    Corey, I would love to know if you feel more “French” now or still American? Also, how about the kids-do they consider themselves 100% or 50/50?
    Jackie
    bliss farm antqiues

    Reply
  38. Denese Vlosky

    It’s been a long time since we’ve written. Who couldn’t love San Francisco? What fortunate lives those children have, France and California.
    One of our children rebounded home but just bought a little cottage, with our help so should be out of the house in about a month. The other is living in a fraternity (oy vey) and left last week.
    It’s great to be home sort of alone (with the mother in the backyard).
    Denese

    Reply
  39. Karen C

    Definitely the culture between America and Europe is worlds apart and it is clear that Australian culture is moving much closer to an American one.
    Sacha has nailed the differences exactly. Clothes, social curtesys, attitudes, personal relationships.
    My sons are Americophiles while I am a Francophile but we are all stuck in the Antipodes.
    I hope Sacha maintains his differences and turns them into part of his ‘charm and mystique’ among the locals.

    Reply
  40. Denise Moulun-pasek

    Seems you are on the path to rediscovering what got the nest started in the first place!

    Reply
  41. Betsy

    I think Sacha should stick to his Birkenstocks and tight shirts, I think they look a lot nicer than baggy pants and shirts.
    He can start a new design trend there in school.
    So nice they are with family and friends who will watch out for them. That certainly would put my mind at ease, you have a wonderful family.
    Betsy

    Reply
  42. Elaine

    I have really enjoyed having my daughter out on her own. It has really simplified life for us and she is very happy. Of course we are lucky that she’s just an hour from home.
    If the kids are open to sharing their American adventure with us, it will be very interesting.
    ~elaine~

    Reply
  43. Jenna

    It took me a bit to get your joke about Mr. Godiva, I thought he chose chocolate over clothes! Hope they both have fun in the sun.

    Reply
  44. littlebadwolf

    i, of course would choose both chocolate and bicycle! meanwhile, if there’s a goodwill or salvation army handy to willow, sasha will do just fine in the wardrobe dept as well as everywhere else.

    Reply
  45. susanna

    What an exciting time for you all! I’m glad that your son and daughter are having a great time here in the States. I thought Chelsea was attending college or university in Paris? Did she transfer to a school in California or is she doing an exchange or something entirely new? And isn’t it interesting to hear your son’s point of view of what American teenage life is like – wardrobe, greetings, kisses et al. And hurray for you and your FH for your new couple time. 🙂

    Reply
  46. Kandi Dahlan

    I enjoyed the photos and the essays in your site very much. Are you a photojournalist? Good luck and best regards.

    Reply

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