How to do the French Cafes without Looking like a Tourist

French cafe Lifestyle

French cafe, morning: 

Walk straight to the counter, when the bartender looks at you, nod your head, point your pointer finger up, and at the same time mouth whisper, "Espresso please". Grab a croissant off the platter, pinch off a bit (do not bite into the croissant) and pop it into your mouth, when the espresso comes, down it in two gulps, do not wince if it is hot, glance at your phone, leave the amount on the tag. Say Merci, Ciao, and leave.

 

Cafe, France, French

 

Doing the French cafes is not an art, but it looks like it when you see the French doing it.

It is such a part of their culture that they do it as easily as they smoke a cigarette without concern or shame.

Having a dog tag along adds to the look.

Sunglasses a must, the bigger the better.

Take your napkin to your lap the moment the waiter serves your meal.

Never put your hands on your lap.

 

 

French-cafe-sign

 

 

Doing the French cafes is not just about having a drink, whether you are alone or not, doing the cafes is also about people watching. Any time of the day. Giving the one over, or being looked at up and down, is not uncommon, the French checkout everyone as if they are on a runway. 

 

 

Cafe, France

French cafe, afternoon:

After breakfast and the morning espresso/croissant scene, lunch comes into play. If you walk into a cafe after 11:30 am and see some tables set up that means they are setting up for lunch. If you want a cafe either go to the counter or sit at one of the tables that are not set up.

12:30 is the beginning of lunch. Lunch is served until 2:30.

At the French cafes choose a ‘plat du jour’ from the chalkboard menu, or at the counter, you can order a sandwich, a classic baguette sandwich is sliced down the center with butter, cheese, and ham, or butter and cheese.

Soda is not a common drink amongst adults. Though if you want a drink order an Orangina.

If you want water you will need to ask for it- "Une carafe d'eau, si vous plait."

Paris is changing, lunch is served nearly throughout the afternoon… but Paris is not France. Most of France adheres to tradition, lunch 12:30 to 2:30. How dare those Parisians breaking the rules, especially after I left and move to the south!

 

French Lifestyle

 

French cafe, after two:

French people meet after two for a coffee if they haven't had one after lunch.

It is not uncommon to meet after two for a coffee and chat.

Alcoholic drinks do not usually appear until after four, though usually after six.

Around four in the afternoon, a little snack from the pastry shop, a tea or hot chocolate are acceptable.

Yes, in France there is an hour for every single thing you pop into your mouth.

 

 

FrenchCafe eat well savor life

 

Photo via google

 

When in France savour every bite.

 

 

Cafe Awnings France

 

Tips are not expected as they are already added to your bill. Though it is a nice gesture to leave fifty cents or two Euros for a larger meal.

When at a French cafe, after your order has been served, the waiter will not approach you again, unless you make a signal that you want something. When you are ready to leave you must make eye contact with your waiter and raise your pointer finger again. Often tourists think the French waiter is ignoring them, but that is not true. In France when you sit at a cafe or at a restaurant your time is private, and the waiter is trained not to invade your private space unless you need them. 

 

Cafe, France, Cafe

 

French cafes, after six:

Bring on the cocktail hour(s)

Known as the "Aperitif".

Drinks before dinner, not at dinner. Wine at dinner. Drinks after dinner. Coffee before four or after dinner, but not during dinner.

Confusing?  

You see why cafes are so important? Drinking hours really means drinking hours.

 

 

French cafe window

 

French cafe after hours: Linger.

The most important rule of all if you do not want to look like a tourist… talk softly, not because your accented voice will give you away, but because the French speak softly in public places. 

 

 

French-Menu

In 1960, France had 200,000 cafes, said Mr. Quartier, president of the National Federation of Cafes, and Brasseries. Now it has fewer than 41,500, with an average of two closing every day.

 

Please do the cafe thing regardless if it is 3:15 and you want a hot chocolate with a splash of cognac and tofu burger with french fries on the side.

 



Comments

21 responses to “How to do the French Cafes without Looking like a Tourist”

  1. I love love love this post. We just returned to Zurich from a driving holiday in France. Reading this first would have been helpful, but truly I think we did o.k. – it’s possible I spoke a bit too loudly at times. (Highly possible. Probable). But I was really trying to be soft-spoken.
    By the end of our trip, when we stopped for 2 nights in Chamonix, I was walking into a care/brasserie and having my morning espresso at the bar. With few words attempted. it was great 🙂
    I should add, I found the espresso in France better than in Italy! Just sayin’.

  2. Annette

    Thanks, Corey! I am the person who asked you to write about how not to look like an American while visiting France. Lots to learn and remember! Any comments about fashion would be welcomed also. Altho, I suspect that it’s impossible not to stand out.

  3. Oh my gosh, the stress of it all. It sounds so chic and fun but I’m certain I could not remember all these rules. I would like to just be there with someone (like you!) who could guide me around, reminding me to keep my voice down 🙂

  4. Fantastic! I’m an American living in England, and the English talk really quietly too. Of course they have ‘tea’ time. And I’ve heard that pubs are closing at an alarming rate too. Wonderful to find your blog!

  5. Great tips, Corey! Sounds like I’ve made some mistakes in my previous French cafe visits, but now I KNOW!
    I’m off to check out your new brocante wears! Glad you’re back in business. I’m dying for a vintage linen sheet set embroidered with “A” – if you find one, let me know!

  6. Just adds to the yearning and burning desire to be in France. Here in California? Sit in your car with the engine running at the drive through window at In-In Out Burger… Although I know plenty of people who are yearning for that too.

  7. Diogenes

    What a great post! I am curious, why are cafes closing at such a rapid rate?

  8. Diogenes

    I’m in CA as well and when my nephews visit from Connecticut all they want is In-N-Out…a mystery to me.

  9. When in Rome … wear a toga and a crown of laurels. When in France, wear a scarf, go to a cafe and eat a dish flavoured with laurel leaves.

  10. Leigh NZ

    I’m not sure that we’ll be able to resist pastries until 4PM. If we spy a particularly delicious looking pastry surely it would be rude not to sample it, no matter the time?

  11. I knew some of the rules, but my goodness I didn’t know them all. Thanks! We broke the rule once in Paris and learned our lesson quickly when we showed up for dinner at 6PM. The waiter told us it was time for those working there to eat and to come back later.

  12. Sage and masterful or mistressful advice!! I will keep this page should i get the chance to partake of French Cafe’s again….Cheers

  13. Jenny N

    This is the awesomest cheat sheet ever Corey. Merci beaucoup. I am bookmarking this one for sure. And, “oh,no” please not fewer cafes. and this is a random aside, but the other day I bought a drape-y black jacket and thought of you and your boho-chic style and bought it because it reminded me of you (and looked great.)

  14. Marie-Noëlle

    I like to observe my own country and country fellows through your eyes !!!
    Waiting for more !!!!
    I’d like to add that, in Paris, SOME café owners tend to focus on profit… So if you linger at a table for too long (well, what HE considers as too long a time), the waiter can bring you the bill without being called (YES!?!)or, when you’ve paid the bill, he can come round to unset the table and clean it while you’re still sitting there (how lovely !!!)…
    Secondly, the number of cafés has dropped vertiginously since 2008, when smoking got forbidden (in all places where you can sit for a drink)…
    Good things can have their down side !

  15. This is being read in Switzerland; on a VERY old notebook on a VERY slow line… but I HAVe to reply!
    Excellent tips on the whole, but I honestly never made your first written coffee experience. I LOVE sitting at the bar, asking for a ‘café très bien serré’ (for a real espresso), ‘un verre d’eau’ (glass of water) and take my time for the watching, chatting, reading etc… I also ALWAYS leave a token tip, ie 20c for a coffee or €2.- for one meal. We must know that waiters are a) proud of their trade and b) lousy paid. If WE can afford to go to a coffee shop, restaurant etc., we also can afford a little extra.
    BEST tip of your post, Corey, is ‘speaking softly’…. so important and so neglected. You NEVER EVER find a French table being overly loud, no matter how many people and kids.
    Lovely post, and a great help to your visitors.
    Love, Kiki

  16. sooo helpful when in France + thank you, Corey! xxpeggybraswelldesign.com

  17. Wish I could dash over yonder and be in a different CAFE every two hours……..Wonderful post!Dont like the closing scenario.Very sad.
    On another note I received my nightshirt via post yesterday and you could have heard me scream with DEELIGHT!!!!!!!!!!ITs wonderful and it FITS!MILLIE GRAZIE BELLA COREY you have made my week!!!!!!!!xoxoxo

  18. Corey writes, “Soda is not a common drink amongst adults” in France. No kidding! I just saw a map on “Slate” depicting average annual soft-drink consumption by country for 80 nations. And…
    Surprise! Surprise! The US is #1, and not in a good way, averaging 170 liters per capita per year. France ranks a respectable 46th place, with 45 liters apiece, while Portugal is quite similar, in 48th place with 42 liters/person.

  19. At cafés I ask for “un thé avec lait et sucre.”

  20. Thanks for the guide ‘how to cafe’ Corey 🙂 I loved the cafes in Paris, well yes, I loved everything in Paris, but starting the day and taking an afternoon break in a cafe was just wonderful.

  21. pam in oregon

    I loved this post and loved sharing it with my daughter. She’s been to France twice in the past 3 yrs, so she loved learning about cafes from your perspective. I often share your post and say “Corey went here, or Corey wrote about this” like we are “real” friends. Thanks for blogging every day, it’s always makes for a great start to my day!!!

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