Stories Collected While Living in France

French la Vie

Under the Blanket of Winter

Chateau de Versailles
Photo Source and photographer of Versailles Christian Milet.

 

Versailles under the blanket of winter. 

That is how it feels here today…

A silent coldness.

Knowing that underneath the winter blanket there is life, warm, rich and full.

We are waiting, holding our friend in prayer and love.

Winter gives us time to reflect, to trust, to hope for spring.

 

 

Fountain de Versailles

Photo Source and photographer of Versailles Christian Milet.

Thank you for your heartfelt prayers, for your friendship, for being here faithful and true. Thank you. I knew I could count on you to pray with me.

Our friend is on life support. I do not know what will happen. I cannot imagine how he will be if he lives. 

Winter is upon him.

 

 

Jardin de Versailles

Photo Source and photographer of Versailles Christian Milet.

My daughter's friend Clemence made me aware of these beautiful photos by Christian Milet, the main photographer of Versailles. 

These photos spoke to me, especially in this moment.

Whenever I see fresh fallen snow, it seems a pity to walk on it. Serene, untouched, calm.

I offered this serenity, this peace to our friend.

 

Beauty, Versailles

Photo Source and photographer of Versailles Christian Milet.

 

At the hospital a cardiologist intern asked me, "What was your friend depressed about?" I said, "He suffers from manic depression / bipolar disorder." The intern looked at me oddly, repeating his question as if I did not understand, saying every word slowly, "What – was – he – depressed – about?" I shook my head and said, "There are many types of depression. Someone can be depressed because they lost their job, or because of an end of a relationship, or because someone died, or even depressed due to their weight…" The intern shook his head yes, thinking I understood his question. I went on to say, "That is called situational depression or adjustment disorder. It is painful too, and can lead to long term depression. Though our friend didn't try to commit suicide because of that type of depression, he wasn't depressed about something, his depression is an illness, an illness that is killing him."

 

 

Statue in versailles

Photo Source and photographer of Versailles Christian Milet.

 

Tubes, wires, beeps, buzzing, tapes and machines surround our friend.

I laid my hands gently on him, one on his chest and another on his head, and prayed, "May the prayers being said, and the love being sent comfort you. May they lead you to your heart's desire. Silencing the voice of your depression and giving you peace. May you find courage in the love of God that you hold true."

 

 

 

Versailles under snow Christian Milet

Photo Source and photographer of Versailles Christian Milet.

 

This journey is woven with joy and sadness.

And as Annie, my oldest friend has told me, "takes courage to live."

 

 

Christian milet winter in Versailles
Photo Source and photographer of Versailles Christian Milet.

 

"When the night has been too lonely,

And the road has been too long,"

 

Versailles jardin

Photo Source and photographer of Versailles Christian Milet.

 

"And you think that love is only for the lucky and the strong,"

 

Versailles Winter in the Snow
Photo Source and photographer of Versailles Christian Milet.

 

"Just remember in the winter, far beneath the bitter snows,"

 

Christian Milet French Photographer:Versailles

Photo Source and photographer of Versailles Christian Milet.

 

"Lies the seed that with the sun's love, in the spring becomes the rose"

The Rose sung by Bette Midler

 

Rising Versailles Christain Milet

Photo Source and photographer of Versailles Christian Milet.

 

 I will continue my daily blog as usual. Though I may not update everyday regarding our friend, until one way or another his path is known. Thank you for your understanding, concern and prayers. I am ever grateful to you.

 

Sunset Versailles

Photo Source and photographer of Versailles Christian Milet.

 

For More Information about Christian Milet click on this link.

Photo Source and photographer of Versailles Christian Milet.

Comments

90 responses to “Under the Blanket of Winter”

  1. Diogenes

    Dear Corey,
    Please know that I care, and that this has been on my mind since your post yesterday. You and Yann are faithful, caring friends and a true support network for him. I am wondering if the doctor should have asked that question….thank you for the beautiful pictures of Versailles.

    Reply
  2. Lynne

    Beautiful Corey . . . although I can’t say I know you, i can say I sense your beautuful caring heart . . . beautiful prayer you said fo your friend. May God bless you . . . and yours . . .

    Reply
  3. Nancy W.

    Thank you for letting us know about your friend. We really do care. it is not necessary to keep posting about it. just know that our prayers continue for all of you. The photos are truly beautiful. Almost as beautiful as the love that emanates from this blog. Blessings to you.

    Reply
  4. carol

    Beautiful words and pictures, dear Corey. Holding you and your friend in my heart. Keeping you both in my prayers.

    Reply
  5. Di

    There are times I lie awake at night, wondering and worrying about those I know who are overcome by the dark, by the winter, and cannot seem to conquer it. One I love very much battles depression and anxiety, succumbing to self-destructive behaviors at times. It breaks my heart. And all I can do is pray, “Lord have mercy, Christ have mercy.” Someday I believe we will understand why some of us are so broken, why it all caves in for some and not others. But for now, mercy! mercy!
    Your friend and you and your husband are in my prayers.
    Take care,
    Di

    Reply
  6. Kathleen

    Was only wondering about your friend Annie ,hope she is well,and what wise words,it takes courage to live………….so true,this life for young adults especially is becoming so uncertain,loss of a career path,unemployment,great expectations by parents or peers,ill health,disability,relationship issues,……it goes on.

    Reply
  7. Star

    Thank you for the update, Corey. Continuing to uplift your friend in prayer. May He be close to both of you also as you minister to him in person.

    Reply
  8. ellmcclain@yahoo.com

    Corey,
    I have said a prayer for your friend. He is fortunate to have friends, like you and Yann, that understand bi-polar disorder. I pray that his illness will subside and that he will be able to carry on.
    Sending my love,
    EM

    Reply
  9. Tongue in Cheek

    Hi Diogenes,
    The doctor is an intern, and I don’t think he was being rude, just trying to understand. xxx See you soon?!

    Reply
  10. Tongue in Cheek

    Hi Kathleen,
    Dear Sweet Annie is fine, thank you! I see her often, she is a gem!

    Reply
  11. Lorrie

    Beautiful, calming words and pictures. The winter of life can be so lonely, so cold. I hope spring returns for your dear friend. Adding my prayers across the miles.

    Reply
  12. Rhonda

    Oh, Corey, I will send my prayers, as I know the power of prayer first hand. I only just read this and feel so badly for you and your friend. What a beautiful post, your words brought tears to my eyes. We just lost a family member this morning to old age and I agree with Annie, it takes courage to live. Very well said, Annie. xo Rhonda

    Reply
  13. Chris Wittmann

    Life is so precious, we’re here for but a short dance in the sun, it’s hard to understand how one can be driven to despair so badly they want to end it. Your friend is definitely in my prayers.

    Reply
  14. CW

    Corey,
    Your story gave me goosebumps. What amazing friends you and Yann are.
    So sorry about your friend. We will keep all of you in our prayers.

    Reply
  15. Shelley Noble

    lovely lovely lovely. Peace to his heart. And my awe of the power in your prayer for him.

    Reply
  16. Monika

    The pictures are heartbreakingly perfect. Absolutely beautiful.
    My heart sank when I read that your friend has bipolar disorder. My grandmother had it. A high school boyfriend, the one who was supposed to take my to the grad dance, had it. A talented pianist, he won a major Bach competition just before Grad, and had a breakdown. He had to be hospitalized and put on lithium. He went to one of the top musical schools, but had to drop out. Although he is a musician, his career trajectory has been curtailed by his illness. Heck, my favorite actor suffers from it.
    That the intern did not understand what bipolar disorder is, that it just happens because of chemical imbalances, tells me that much work needs to be done in the field of public health to make people — even medical professionals — understand. It is so important to be on the correct medication, at the correct dosages. And even then…
    I am so sad to hear that your friend is on life support. I will continue to keep him — and you and Yann — in my thoughts and prayers.

    Reply
  17. barbara

    when i wake at night with worry i pray the prayer that cannot fail ‘Thy Will be Done’. i know i have no control. i pray it for your friend. and i pray for you. this post is so beautiful it brought me to tears and touch my heart.

    Reply
  18. Cynthia Rieth

    Thoughts and prayers being sent, so difficult to watch and not able to do anything.

    Reply
  19. Claudia

    Beautiful post Corey. I adore the photographs and I’m playing Bette Midler ‘The Rose’ to my son right now and I read him the words from it that your wrote. What beautiful and meaningful poetry.
    I’ll pray for your friend and hope for the best for him.

    Reply
  20. Lorraine

    Dear Corey,
    I hope your friend finds peace, happiness and freedom.

    Reply
  21. g

    corey i read and re-read the post- all of you have been with me through the night and this day and will be for all the days to come silently embracing all with love peace and hope-

    Reply
  22. Helene

    You have a wonderful way of expressing what is in your heart. May you all find peace in what God brings.

    Reply
  23. Michele

    Oh dear Corey & French husband . . . my entire heart is sent over the oceans along with the deepest prayers for you and hurting friend. Depression hurts and hurts unlike any physical ailment. Your response to the doctor came from the knowledge of the best physician we know – God. Your friends time is known only by our Great Physician. May the warmth that you’ve asked for surround him now and forever.

    Reply
  24. Sandra Thomas

    A beautiful post in the midst of such pain. Your friend is so blessed by your being present and showing grace. We are praying for him, as well as you and French husband as you walk along side a dear one.

    Reply
  25. Eileen

    Your friend is in my thoughts and prayers. He is so very fortunate to have friends like you.

    Reply
  26. Lana Kloch

    i am lifted by your writings and photos. i send prayers and hope that your friend will recover..tho it looks less promising.
    it was difficult to accept that an intern would not understand bi=polar depression. yes, it is not situational.. with the advances in the medical field, much can be done to lift the depression. it is a chemical imbalance that can be treated with medicine and therapy.
    i pray he gets a chance to life a life that is filled with joy.. his attempt at suicide is a move away from the pain he feels. only, it is a permanent relief.
    today, i got a call that my uncle died suddenly. his wife died 3 mos ago. think he died of a broken heart.
    am trying to understand this cycle of life and appreciate those whom i whole so dear.
    lana cano kloch

    Reply
  27. Pamela RG

    Beautiful pictures Corey. I am praying for your friend. May he feel God’s love, healing and mercy. May the Holy Spirit heal him and give him courage to live. Your prayer to him is powerful. May God bless you and your friend.

    Reply
  28. Sarah

    I’m so sorry to hear of your friends illness, sadness and pain. My ex husband suffered from paranoia, and mental illness sucks for lack of a better word. I hope your friend can recover his health both mentally and physically.

    Reply
  29. Niki Weippert

    I’m so sorry to hear about your friend. I will be praying for him.

    Reply
  30. Kathie B

    I’m appalled that the doctor seems to have been unaware that depression can be biochemical (irrespective of events in the patient’s life), and am so glad you set him straight.
    You and Yann have been such loyal and caring friends to your friend in crisis. I’m hoping for the best outcome for him, whatever that may prove to be.

    Reply
  31. Paulita

    Corey, Thanks for your update and your devotion to your friend. I’m learning more and more about depression as a member of my family has also been living with this illness. One thing I’ve heard is that some people just have a hard time finding their place in the world, no matter how much those around love him/her.

    Reply
  32. LauraInSeattle

    Corey, you move me to tears often. Your words and insight pierce the heart with their honesty and beauty. I will continue to hold your dear friend in my prayers.

    Reply
  33. Debrs

    I am behind in catching up – my thoughts and prayers are with you m friend.

    Reply
  34. judyo

    I am holding your friend in my prayers. Lots of prayers this week. My friend who was in hospice died yesterday and my best friend’s sixteen year old nephew tried to commit suicide this week and is on life support too.

    Reply
  35. Bev S.

    Oh Corey, I’m sure that you are just exhausted. I had this feeling that things were not good as you did not post all day. I pray that you can rest and continue to take care of yourself. My prayers continue to be with your friend. Keep talking to him, as you well know, hearing is the last thing to go.

    Reply
  36. Wendy

    Thank you, Laura, for putting my thoughts into words better than I could.

    Reply
  37. Susan

    Oh Corey, you are such a poet… Your blogging family will continue praying and hoping to hear good news soon.
    I pray that the Lord wraps you in his comfort and cares gently for your friend.
    Blessings

    Reply
  38. Ann

    In college I had a roommate who was diagnosed as manic-depressive. I tried to be her friend but she spent most of her time in her room smoking pot which helped her. Eventually she moved back home. I saw how painful it was for her and never really understood the gravity of her illness. Prayers and hugs… do what you can but also take care of yourself.

    Reply
  39. BeckyF

    Corey, Our prayers continue for all of you. May you all be blanketed in love and peace. So sad.

    Reply
  40. jody

    Corey, thank you for the update. my prayers continue.may all of you standing with this dear soul have peace.
    may your friend have his mind at rest, and God and his angels come swiftly with healing.. xo jody

    Reply
  41. Momof5

    Another beautiful if sad post with wise words from Annie. I’m wrapping you all in a virtual hug.(((())).

    Reply
  42. amylia

    Corey, When there seem to be no words of my own to express such things, I look to poetry. These borrowed words from Mary Oliver’s poem “At Blackwater Pond” sprang forth as I read your post and thought of you at his bedside:
    Look, the trees
    are turning
    their own bodies
    into pillars
    of light,
    are giving off the rich
    fragrance of cinnamon
    and fulfillment,
    the long tapers
    of cattails
    are bursting and floating away over
    the blue shoulders
    of the ponds,
    and every pond,
    no matter what its
    name is, is
    nameless now.
    Every year
    everything
    I have ever learned
    in my lifetime
    leads back to this: the fires
    and the black river of loss
    whose other side
    is salvation,
    whose meaning
    none of us will ever know.
    To live in this world
    you must be able
    to do three things:
    to love what is mortal;
    to hold it
    against your bones knowing
    your own life depends on it;
    and, when the time comes to let it go,
    to let it go.

    Reply
  43. Susan

    Corey, if more people were like you the world would be a brighter place. Undoubtedly, your friend has felt the love from your immediate family, and your extended family around the globe. In his current state, he continues to feel this love and receives our arms wrapped tightly around him.

    Reply
  44. Karen@PasGrand-Chose

    Dear Corey, I’m holding you and your friend in my thoughts and heart.

    Reply
  45. Massilianana

    Dear Corey,thanks for the beautiful pictures of Versailles, the lyrics of The Rose and your words . I hope your friend feels this beauty, this strength, the caring feelings and the love. I hope he finds a way to a more peaceful life and recovers well to rebuild himself.Take care.

    Reply
  46. Susan

    It’s Thursday morning here in Zurich, and I’m glad I checked in here. Your images are so beautiful and consoling. I’m so glad you are there for your friend, passing along our prayers and concern through your loving touch. The words to “The Rose” are so deeply moving to me at any time, but especially in this situation.
    God bless you Corey, and your family. And especially your friend. Annie is right – we need courage for our life’s journey.
    (Side note: I was stunned that you needed to explain the type of depression afflicting your friend)

    Reply
  47. Kit

    Thank you for sharing those beautiful pictures, Corey. I hope the snow blanket over your friend keeps him safe until healing comes. Manic depression is such a hard condition to live with and, in a way, even harder on those who love the person with that condition. Sending lots of love your way.

    Reply
  48. Zosia

    I know someone whose son suffers from this illness. It is a terrible and devastating condition for the person who has it and for their family and friends.
    Thinking of you and your friend and holding you close to my heart.

    Reply
  49. Nikki ~ Picnics in Provence

    Terribly sad and trying times for you and your family, your friend and his family. Thinking of you all Corey and sending huge hugs.
    Nikki

    Reply
  50. Tongue in Cheek

    Lana
    Your family is in my prayers. I am so sorry to hear your news.
    C

    Reply
  51. Tongue in Cheek

    Judy, oh how sad. I feel for you and those you love. My prayers join yours. May their be peace, and may love heal their wounds. x

    Reply
  52. Tongue in Cheek

    Love and hugs Paulita!

    Reply
  53. Tongue in Cheek

    xxx

    Reply
  54. 24/7 in France

    I love Versailles in any weather – my favorite place to be. Hoping that your friend pulls through and my thoughts are with you at this difficult time.

    Reply
  55. LibbyW

    Trust steadily in God. Hope unswervingly. Love extravagantly. These things remain. The greatest of these is Love. So often hidden in the dark & the cold. May there be a breakthrough of light & understanding for your dear friend, Corey.

    Reply
  56. Jeannie

    When I find myself in times of trouble
    Mother Mary comes to me
    Speaking words of wisdom, let it be
    And in my hour of darkness
    She is standing right in front of me
    Speaking words of wisdom, let it be
    Wishing you and your friend peace.

    Reply
  57. Merisi

    You are in my thoughts. xxx
    Love,
    M.

    Reply
  58. kim

    It is a terrible disease. People suffer badly when they have it and can’t find the right medication. I am thinking of you and your friend at this very painful and poignant time.

    Reply
  59. Jody

    Corey,
    Thank you for the update. We will continue to hold your friend and your family in our prayers. Your words and photos are so beautiful, I’m sure even now (maybe especially now) your friend knows you are there for him.

    Reply
  60. Jeanne

    God bless your friend and all of you. Keeping you all in my prayers………….and thoughts
    God bless Annie with her wise words and blessings for you all. Love and hugs
    Jeanne

    Reply
  61. Tracy

    Praying for the best, whatever that may be….

    Reply
  62. Sue

    Dear Corey, What a wonderful friends you and Yann are. Your pictures were so beautiful. I’ve known family members with depression and seen the sadness it brings for the person having the disease and everyone in contact. Stay strong Corey. My prayers for healing and peace are with you all.

    Reply
  63. Carol

    Oh, dear Corey, I’m late to this post with it’s heart-breaking news.
    I will continue to pray for your friend in the manner of your beautiful prayer for him and also for all of you who love him.

    Reply
  64. Laura

    Corey, I’m late to this too. SOOOO sorry. Bless you all. Will pray for peace for all involved. Take care of yourself!

    Reply
  65. cindy hattersley

    Corey
    My niece is bi polar and it has nearly broken her parents. They are shells of their former selves. Thinking of you

    Reply
  66. Marilyn Radzat

    I love the image that came to me of silken threads of energy coming from your words, images, from your heart….traveling out across the world to be picked up with our needles of prayer, compassion and community… to be woven into a cocoon that holds your friend. Silken threads of compassion and healing prayer that hold us all…together in love.
    Thy Will Be Done.

    Reply
  67. mary

    Mental illness is very sad not much is known about it. I feel we need to have much more research in this area as so many people are affected but many times it is not visible with the eyes like a physical disease.
    May Gods love surround you all and help with your grief.

    Reply
  68. DebinIN

    This was a wonderful post, Corey. In this time of turmoil and uncertainty in your world you have instilled a sense of peace, tranquility and even antcipation for what lies beneat the snow to mine. Amazing–and appreciated.

    Reply
  69. Merisi

    I am only now able to find words about the intern without a clue (medical student? I hope not!). Maybe she should talk to a psychiatrist, to learn the difference between “feeling” depressed and suffering from clinical depression, a serious physical ailment which has nothing to do with feeling blue.

    Reply
  70. Kristin Yates

    I am riveted to your blog. Your heart is true and right, and your eyes bring amazement to me every day. I’m so glad I found you. It makes me happy as I imagine the strength you get rom reading all the comments you receive. Thanks for doing this.

    Reply
  71. KAMFreeman

    Corey
    Thank you for beautifully expressed thoughts, prayers, feelings….the photos are exquisite. Prayers continue to flow out from my heart, the words I speak are for peace and love to wrap around you, Yann and your friend. Thank you for allowing us all to be with you on this journey.
    With all love,
    Kristin

    Reply
  72. Laurie SF

    Beautiful words. Beautiful pictures. Beautiful you.
    Lovely..

    Reply
  73. marlis

    You are right, it takes courage to live and it takes courage to decide not to live. I’ve been praying for you so that you know how to minister to your friend and provide the caring touch he so desperately needs. Praying for him that God wraps His arms around him and gives him comfort. xo marlis

    Reply
  74. Jillayne

    A heart-wrenching, love-filled post. I am also praying for your friend, for what Annie says – it does take strength to live but your friend’s actions take another kind of strength I think. It cannot be an easy thing to contemplate, nor to act on and when you know you are enveloped in the love of the world, it must be that much more difficult.
    Thinking of all of you…

    Reply
  75. La Contessa

    OH,MY…………these photos you have shared are just beautiful.Wouldn’t you know I recently went to the LEGION OF HONOR to see ROYAL TREASURES from the LOUVRE and picked up a book on VERSAILLES because it was so beautiful.A square book with gold pages…………I’m reading or rather staring at all that beauty yesterday and today!I wonder if its the same photographer…….
    Saw Cheryl yesterday and we both spoke of you and your news.She came with me to see you in Willows when your friend was with FRENCH husband.I recall how you told him to pack his luggage!You have done EVERYTHING right Corey!As ANNIE says………”It takes courage to live.”

    Reply
  76. Laurie Hodson

    Continuing prayers that God’s will be done for your dear friend and that you can find peace in this too.

    Reply
  77. Anjanette

    Prayers and love to all of you…beautiful words that speak love and truth, ones that I wish I didn’t understand intimately.
    God Bless your friend, Yann, your family and you Corey!

    Reply
  78. Peggy Braswell

    A dear friend has a son who has this terrible condition. It is a devastating condition for the person who has it and for their family. So special, you & FH are there with him! continued prayers for him + you & FH. Arms around you all. xxpeggybraswelldesign.com

    Reply
  79. Karen Carson

    A beautiful meditation today at this most somber of times. I will continue to pray for you all…

    Reply
  80. Sharon Morrison

    My dear Corey, I am sorry to hear this news regarding your friend. It seems he was at your home not long ago for dinner. Depression is a terrible disease. It feels like a fog that wraps around your feet and slowly winds around your legs. Before you know it, you are blind to clear thinking. My prayers are with him, and you.

    Reply
  81. Rosemary

    Corey,
    The pictures are so lovely on today’s post, and your words too. I send prayers to you and Yann and your dear friend. Bipolar is such a destructive disease. My he find peace.

    Reply
  82. Marilyn

    These prayers surround you, your family, and your friend. Annie is so wise, life so truly can be a struggle. Your prayer for your friend couldn’t have been said more lovingly and beautifully. Hugs are there to surround you in this time.

    Reply
  83. diane – florida

    The photos are beautiful but may be linked forever with the images of your friend’s torture, a brain that can glimpse at a world that is not a frozen, desolate landscape and be condemned to a life that will never thaw. I remember Marie Osmond describing her depression as, ‘it seemed like the sun would never shine again’. I have at times struggled with depression and similar thoughts of escape and it is horrible to hear of another person’s torture. I have found that some people have an almost insatiable need for certain nutrients to break the grip of depression. If I do not daily take supplements of B complex and EPA’s (fish oil), I find myself sinking into that ‘dark place’. I have heard of others whose lifelong depression lifted after having these deficiencies attended. I wish for the very best for you and your friend.

    Reply
  84. Cathy

    Dear Corey,
    I’m very sad that this has been the journey for your friend. I’m sure you are a ray of hope for him. Take care of yourself & bless you for having such a kind & loving heart.
    Cathy

    Reply
  85. sue at naperville now

    a beautiful and heart-breaking post, Corey. sending prayers.

    Reply
  86. shirley

    Prayers.

    Reply
  87. Chico Sue

    Depression doesn’t need a reason, it just IS! And what a debilitating illness it is! Peace with you and your family and your friend, and may God’s will be done.

    Reply
  88. Sue Morris

    As someone above this comment of mine posted, “It takes courage to Live, and it takes Courage Not to Live”….this I firmly believe. Corey, your words, together with the accompanying pictures spoke of much sadness, but also spoke very strongly of the depth of your own feelings for your friend……May he find the peace that he is searching for, may he be firmly held in the arms of our God and Saviour and, may you and your family continue to be held in “His” arms as you all struggle with your own feelings.
    Gentle Hugs Susanawee…West.Australia.

    Reply
  89. Brenda L. from TN.

    I am so sorry about your friend….but you are right…his DEPRESSION IS THE SICKNESS…NOT whatever the reason for it…he needs the correct diagnosis/meds/doctor to help him…I pray he can get the help he needs…and Thank You and FH for being there offering major support and love.

    Reply
  90. Erika

    These beautiful pictures bring peace to me. Thank you for posting something so calming and graceful. As to your friend, I will say a prayer for calming peace and grace for him and his loved ones. {hugs}

    Reply

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