Father’s Day… My Father’s Eulogy

My Father's Eulogy

"Looking out I see many family and friends… It is such a healing gift to be surrounded by your love for my father. Thank you for coming and showing my family and me that my father holds a special place in your heart.

Your friendship allows us to know that my father will be nearby because of the memories stored within you. Please share them with us… never hold back, not now or in the years to come.

After 90 days at the hospital my mind’s eye and heart were full of my dad’s journey that he bear-ed with such grace.… My dad showed me courage, he showed me that he could endure much pain; he showed me dignity is his suffering.

My father’s death was beautiful… my family gathered around his bedside, prayed, saw him gaze lovingly into our eyes, knowing- trusting he was going to the heart of God, that his family on the other side was waiting for him with arms wide open.

It was a long and brave journey made whole.

I have struggled to find the right words, the right stories, the right note that would speak truly of my father…

But there are simply too many….. Family, faith, Ferndale, farming, fiesta, Westport,  motorcycles …..

Single words that hold a lifetime connecting you, my family… to my dad. He had a rich life… a giving life and life that I admired even to his last breath…

I only hope I can be so strong…that I can be as generous in my love as he was in his abundant love for life and family.

He was a man of faith, and the rosary was never far from his lips.

Our family is the way it is because of my father’s and mother’s faith, their faith in God. It is a legacy of love that cannot be taken even in death. It lends us grace and gives us courage.

My Mother and Father shared a special love story, one that was real, honest, and paved the way for us their children to follow: Before my father died my mother told him: That out of all the beautiful women she was luckiest because he choose her, and that she was so happy to be his wife, and the mother of his children.

Listening to my Mother in that moment sharing with my dad her love… oh how he beamed, his face lit up full of love before starting his journey home.

My mother’s love was sacred to him.

This is what I know to be true….

My father loved unconditionally, it didn’t matter what you did or didn’t do, and it didn’t matter if you where his color or how old you were…. it didn't matter what opinion you held, or if you rode a motorcycle or not….My dad loved and was loved. Who could ask for anything more? What a valuable gift I saw in my father’s attitude.

My brother Marty said, “That dad stopped aging at 60 or maybe 40….he simply did not grow old.” Life was something he enjoyed. And he lived it everyday to the fullest, in style and young at heart.

Every child should have a Father who shows them what love is all about. I could tell you over 81 reasons in a blink of an eye, why my Dad was a gem. How he was a generous man, how he would give you the shirt off his back, his wrangler jeans, boots and helmet too….even if he was standing, stranded outside, in a snowstorm, and you had a snowsuit on. He was loving down to the bare bone.

Every child should have a Father who tells them that the world is abeautiful place, and that they are worthy of it..

Oh Dad how you were so strong, so beautiful so extra cool!

We will see you Dad, yes we will see you in the rice fields as they flood and take root. We will see you in the eyes of your grandchildren and in all those that loved you. We will hear you in the memories that are stored in our hearts and that will be told and retold and remain vibrate for eternity.  We will hear you with each Ninety, Harley, Honda and skid of the bicycle wheel. We will hear you when we turn on the radio and see Mom grabbing one of the grandchildren to teach them to jitterbug in the kitchen.  Oh yes Dad you are here I see you in the eyes of those gathered here, of the many familiar faces, I see you greeting them with your sideways smile and easy laugh.

We will see you as the seasons turn, unfold and render… We have an abundant harvest in your love and you will be missed…"

Remembering my Father with joy and thanksgiving.

-Tell me about your Father?



Comments

25 responses to “Father’s Day… My Father’s Eulogy”

  1. Good Morning from Zurich.
    First what a lovely Eulogy. Every word was so beautiful. Thank you for sharing it with us. You must miss him, especially today. Bless you.
    My father is 88 years old, lives in Anchorage, Alaska, and is my hero. He has lived a life of faith for the past 70 years and set an example of generosity and love for me and my brother. All my life I knew that he loved me unconditionally and that right below my Mom, my brother and I were the most important people in the world to him.
    He has devoted the last 10 years to caring for my dear mother, as she declines due to Alzheimers. Even now while she resides in a cared-nursing home (where she is expertly and kindly nursed and loved by a wonderful staff) my Dad visits daily and would never dream of missing a day. He kept her home with him as long as possible. Watching his devotion and steadfast love is a beautiful thing.
    Like I said, he is my hero.
    *thanks for asking 🙂

  2. I miss my Dad. He was a college professor, an artist, an introvert, a genius, a fisherman, a golfer, a sports announcer, a tall, quiet man who loved his children.

  3. Claudia

    Beautiful, Corey. I was in the back of the church as you read this, in the standing room only crowded back aisle. The balcony and aisles of that very large church were filled with people of such diversity that In any other situation it would have been a puzzle as to what had brought them all together. The number of people there to remember your dad showed that he was loved and your words explained why.

  4. Your post today brought tears to my eyes. I miss my dad too, every day I think of him. It’s been so many years since he departed this life. My dad was the best dad anyone could ever have. He was kind, generous, full of optimism and good humor. He always saw the good side of life, and if ever he was worried about something he rarely let it show, but to his own detriment kept alot of things inside. He was a WWII vet and loved his country. My dad died in a hospital bed, and I was not with him, only a close friend was nearby. I had left the hospital about an hour before he passed. But I feel his spirit with me every day.

  5. My Father, he was precise, calm, but had his limits. He was meticulously neat and thorough, though almost OCD. He could be demanding and uncompromising, yet those qualities were why he was successful. He grew up through the depression and he taught us many practical things for having endured it. I was his baby, the caboose…and I miss him so badly it aches! I was told that when he spanked me, he rubbed my slapped leg with alcohol to take the sting away.

  6. What a beautiful eulogy, Corey. Thank you for sharing it and for sharing your life with us.
    My father is 87 and is the best man I know. He takes care of my 85 year old mother and is a devoted, loving husband. I have always felt his love and know that it will always be there. Everyone should be so fortunate.

  7. My dad is an amazing man. He loves adventure, visiting new countries (he’s on his 90something right now as he and my 72 year-old mom are camping through East Africa), trying new things, always learning. I’m convinced he has a photographic memory although he says that he doesn’t. He can squeeze more money than possible out of a dollar. He is a man of deep faith, a retired pastor whose work really began after retirement.
    For the past 10 years, he has headed a group which provides wheelchairs (but more like bicycles) for polio victims in Nigeria. They have given over 5000 since they started. He has also given away more canes for the blind then that. He has a real heart for the disabled who, at least in Nigeria, are marginalized.

  8. Brenda L. from TN.

    I was born on Father’s Day June 21, 1942. My daddy said I was the smallest baby in the nursery….5 lbs. He said I had the tiniest feet and hands he every saw. He used to carry me on his shoulders when we were in large crowds when I was older. Sadly, my parents divorced when I was about 6 yrs old. My daddy “got me” every weekend until I was about 12-13 yrs old. That’s when I started spending the nights at girlfriends houses. But he would still stop by the house during the week to see me. I was an only child. My parents never re-married anyone else. My daddy died when I was 24 yrs old with lung cancer. But he got to see his two grandsons who were 3 1/2 and 2 when he died. I’m gratful for that. I have many sweet memories of my daddy and I thought your eulogy for your father was beautiful.
    Thank you for asking about my daddy.

  9. I have a huge lump in my throat and tears streaming down my cheeks having just read your eulogy. I too had a wonderful dad and I miss him beyond measure. We must count our blessings for having had such great men in our lives.

  10. Of all the days to stop by. You had a very special father, I did not. I am so happy today for all the children that had special, loving fathers. Your eulogy tells it all.

  11. Marilyn in Chico, Ca

    My father was not like your father. You were truly blessed.

  12. Just beautiful, Corey. It also tells the story of why you are so very special – like father, like daughter.

  13. Jeannie

    All I have done today is cry and your post put me over the edge once again. Dad has a few days left, but each breath may be his last. I have said my goodbyes and I am ready for him to join his family that have gone before him. The waiting for peace is the hardest. I think that is what we want for everyone – peace of heart, mind, and body. Dad had his moments and we butted heads often. Yet, he taught me more about creating and doing better than I ever thought I could do in every undertaking. I went to college at 30. I married the same year I graduated. Dad (who finished the 10th grade), had my diploma placed next to the guest book at the wedding reception. He made sure everyone knew what I had accomplished and it wasn’t the Mrs degree. 🙂 So, I am waiting this Father’s Day knowing it will be his last. It will not be mine. I will think of him each and every day.

  14. You have said all the words in my heart today. Thank you.

  15. Love this story about your dad Bev.

  16. My dad died when I was 9. I always knew I was loved by him and it has sustained me even now all these years later. I often wonder what it would have been like had he lived. I think he would have been like the other loved fathers mentioned here living life fully into his 90’s. I spent a wonderful father’s day with two of my adult children able to be home for their dad and visiting friends with their two young children. As I watched both my husband and the young dad I realized how lucky my adult children and those two little ones are to have such loving involved fathers. There was so much laughter and love at our dinner table tonight. I felt it and I know the “kids” big and little did too. You wrote a lovely eulogy for your dad Corey.

  17. Dear Jeannie,
    I am thinking of you xxx

  18. Claudia
    Thank you. I remember and have always appreciated your presences that day. Another reader was there too, Dee. Sending you a big hug!

  19. TEXAS FRANCOPHILE

    First let me dab my tears. So sweet of you to ask about my Daddy. I was his baby and his oldest. He was my alpha and omega. He was tough, generous, sharp, extremely quick witted, adventuresome, and consistent. He was in the oil business so he showed me the world and taught me to be confident and not fear the unknown. I miss him terribly. At 90 he was ready to go. I’m convinced he stayed that long for mine and my Mothers sake. Your tribute to your Dad was beautiful. I see so much of you in your description of him. Thank you for sharing your life as you often describe my feelings but your words are so eloquently written…xoxo

  20. What a beautiful tribute! What a man!

  21. Rene’ Taylor

    Thank you for sharing this Beautiful story. My Father was very much like yours. He made the world a better place and touched so many people lives. He went in on D-Day on the shores of Normandy in World War II. He survived to walk with General Patton all the way to Berlin. He was found frozen…frost-bitten under a dead German soldier in a fox hole.The medics that found him took him to the field hospital and Penicillin was experimentally given to him and the new medicine saved his life.
    He met my Mother in an Elevator at the Bank he worked at for 46 years. She waited for him to return from the war and they had six childrens, they were devout Catholics, loved to dance, helped the poor and elderly, andinstilled in me a stong Faith and value system, the Nuns Irish nuns helped with that too….It made me appreciate the the little things in life as well as the finer things.
    I have no doubt that I will see them again. Their spirits are so Good….their strength they left with me. I am truly blessed! Many times I have wanted to write to tell you how much you have brightened my day by your kind words, and the absolutely beautiful things you share.
    It is inspirational to see people show their gratitude and true Love. Merci, Rene’

  22. Father’s so special to us all. xxpeggybraswelldesign.com

  23. Thank you Corey for sharing your dad’s eulogy. My dad died in 1989. He was 83 and I was 44. He was the glue that held my life together. He saw the world and all people as beautiful and worthwhile. People responded to him in the most positive way. He was a musician and I used to meet him in NYC between shows (Broadway). He also taught guitar and would spend way more time than he was paid for with his students, in particular those who had a handicap. He brought his students home for dinner, gave them furniture if they were just starting out and supported them with his love and approval. Sometimes my mom would wake up to find some guy asleep on the living room couch. She ask “who is that bum” and he would respond, “you should hear this guy play the trumpet.” I still have letters he sent to me and I to him when he was on the road. Always supportive through difficult times, telling me to hang in and things would be ok. Even in my 40s, if we were out someplace he’d stop people and say “this is my daughter, isn’t she beautiful?” He’d do the same with my mom and sister. On the day of his funeral, I thought that if I didn’t go out to the limousine when it came to pick us up, it wouldn’t be real if I didn’t open the door. I still meet people who knew him and tell me what he meant to them in their lives. He was the oldest of eight of an immigrant family. He had to quit school to help support them. I could go on and on. I’ll never stop missing him. Thought they never met him, my grandchildren refer to him as Papa Ruby and know all the wonderful stories about him. Thanks for letting me ramble!

  24. You moved me to tears. The love my dad had for me is till here with me, I can feel it everyday and it makes me strong and at peace.

  25. My dad was my loudest cheerleader. He thought I could do anything. His confidence in me was the wind beneath my wings.
    I hope and pray that my children will say the same of me when I am gone.
    Lovely tribute.
    Just lovely.
    D xo

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