Stories Collected While Living in France

French la Vie

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Fifty Shades of Red

French Brocante Happening

 

We were at the brocante French Husband and I standing at the stand of a dealer that I regularly buy from. It amazes me over and over again at the stuff these dealers have to offer. Not one or two or five things that I like but let's say except one or two or five things that I do not like. While summing up what they had and what I wanted to buy I realized that the main dealer, the person's husband wasn't there. So I asked (in French),

"How is your husband? Is he okay (il est bien)?"

 

Parlez vous brocante

 

The dealer, an attractive women with a ready smile, starred at me quizzically. At first I thought her stare meant something was wrong so I put my hand to my heart, repeating myself,

"He is okay?"

She turned to her grown son (who suffers mental difficulties) and offered, "Yes, my son is good. Thank you."

With that it was my turn to look as her quizzically. Obviously something wasn't right. Did she think I thought her son was her husband? I cautiously added, "I can see your son is good, but but what about your husband is he okay?" With that said she looked at me as if something "clicked", an understanding you might say, she nodded her head upwards as one does when one finally gets something.

"Yes, yes, mais oui (but yes) he is well."

 

 

Parlez vous brocante bien

 

French Husband and I collected our purchases, said our goodbyes and headed towards the car. Then French Husband turned to me and asked, "Corey can I correct your French?" Usually when he says this I know that two or three seconds earlier I have made an embarrassing faux pas. I braced myself, "Sure. What was wrong this time?" 

"Well when you asked "Il est bien?" You thought you were asking, "Is he okay?". But "Il est bien?" Doesn't translate that way. You need to ask instead "Il va bien?". When you said, il est bien, it was understood as, "He is good" like in a sexy cute way such as: "Is he good?" As in he's nice. You know what I mean by good and nice?"

 

 

Fifty shades of red

 

 

Fifty shades of RED is what I became.

"You mean to say when I ask people tu est bien, or il est bien, I have been saying, "Your goooooood or he is goooooooood?!!!" Oh God." Red endured.

You can be sure I won't be asking that anytime soon. Correction learned. Red fading.

 

Comments

21 responses to “Fifty Shades of Red”

  1. Sue

    And, the longer you’ve been living in your adopted country the more embarrassing it is!!! You have my deepest empathy, dear Corey!

    Reply
  2. Ana

    This put a smile on my face. All the times those French eyebrows must have raised and all those smiles that you thought were meant to be polite , LOL, as the kids say, laugh out loud!!!
    Ooh la la

    Reply
  3. Lois

    Oh my goodness. Wait until the next time you have to look him in the eye!

    Reply
  4. Tessa~

    -grin- Oh that French language!
    How have you gotten through living there, all these years? -giggggggggles-
    Tessa~

    Reply
  5. Laura Ingalls Gunn

    Smiles. Last week in French class I said Je suis chaud. After my instructor picked herself off the floor she said, “Perhaps. But in the future you will want to say J’ai chaud.”

    Reply
  6. Marilyn

    Smiling! Languages can be a challenge even when you use them all the time. How nice of FH to wait to correct you after heading for the car.

    Reply
  7. Paulita

    So good to know even long-time residents of France make silly mistakes. I bet you made many people’s days by telling them they were hot.

    Reply
  8. Rebecca from the pacific northwest

    25 years there, and still learning French. The hard way.
    (When you wrote “Il va bien” that rang a vague bell in my high school memories banks like “comment allez vous”, how do you GO, which this American girl always thought was odd but there you go, it’s how they say it. I did NOT know the “goooooooood” connotation of “il est bien” however. Hahahaha.)
    Poor you. Very tactful of FH.

    Reply
  9. nancy w

    Poor Corey. You should not be red as I am sure your accent explained the mistake. At least you have learned by caring enough to try.

    Reply
  10. Kathie B

    Corey, not a day passes that I don’t massacre the Portuguese egregiously 🙁 The most important lesson I’ve learned from my professor and my friends is to keep trying (and to try to remember the corrections!), because people are pleased that any time someone cares enough to try. I’m sure the same’s true for you WRT French. Plus, except for Chelsea and Sacha, I doubt there are very few around there who speak English as well as you do!

    Reply
  11. Shelley Noble

    Oh, just admit it, you would have asked that question as well, in most cases. oxox

    Reply
  12. paula s in new mexico

    Ha! Oh well, red is a very nice color!

    Reply
  13. Jan Wasmann

    Corey, your encounters always bring a smile to my face, just as I bet they do to everyone you meet for they see your heart is kind. You do have a wicked sense of humor though! I bet you memory is racing back through all the times you’ve said this, it should make you laugh, not turn 50 shades of red!

    Reply
  14. Patti L

    loved the story and the post cards!! Life is good!

    Reply
  15. Maria

    I think I might have turned to my husband and said “now you tell me? After 20 years in France?!” :))

    Reply
  16. Jan

    What a great story…nothing like a good giggle to start the day! ::D
    You have such a way of telling a story that I felt I was right there with you. Thanks for taking us to the brocante!

    Reply
  17. Teresa Young

    Such a good story…I love to read your tales. I could totally see me doing that. How embarrassing. I was just thinking , what if she had answered that! That might had been interesting. Teresa

    Reply
  18. SusieQ

    Oh, now I’m worried. If you make such faux pas, think what is going to happen to me at the brocante in June! YIKES. Rosetta Stone still has a long way to go with me before I can even think I might speak something even close to French. Help!

    Reply
  19. Gail

    Oh my… That is so, so funny!

    Reply
  20. Shannon Marie

    Hahahahaha!

    Reply
  21. Cindy

    I’m giggling because I have made so many language errors in my life! I guess Il va bien would be an idiom (an expression where you cannot translate literally) as we might say “He is hot” not meaning at ALL that he has a physical temperature over 96.8 degrees. At least it was your husband who corrected you and in private — I’m sure he has made errors in English over the years and you have had a few chuckles over that???? (I hope so……….) 🙂

    Reply

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