Stories Collected While Living in France

French la Vie

The Poetry in the Faded Tulips

 

Faded flowers

 

 

The tulips dried in a vase, bowed softly.

I sat on the edge of the chair finding them more beautiful than when I first bought them.

"Should I toss them out?" French Husband asked.

I shook my head, "They speak poetry to me."

Thankfully, French Husband gets my imagination, he nodded and gave me a gentle look.

Two weeks ago I bought them when an annual check up, a blood test came back slightly skewed.

My doctor advised a MRI to be safe.

 

Faded flowers

 

 

I was anxious. Scared. Worried. I found myself asking and answering in my own conversation. 

"The blood test is off…"

"But I feel fine."

"You felt fine when you had ovarian cancer."

"If I were ill I wouldn't feel this good."

"Remember last time."

My friend Cheryl reminded me that the old fear was awaken by this scare and that I was layering on it. "Your past is not your present, believe that."

I tried.

 

Wilted Tulips

 

 

When we are confronted with our own mortality the depth of who we are comes to surface. The meaning of everything sits by our side, and tulips can speak.

I took confidence in the love I saw in French Husband's eyes.

Those dogs that walked along side of me (yesterday's post) spoke volumes.

I waited without layering on to the old fear. It wasn't easy.

 

 

Faded flowers

 

 

The results were good. But the reminder was powerful.

Flowers fade. Beauty remains.

I don't want to forget that feeling of urgency, the enourmous joy of the moment in front of me, that whatever happens I want to embrace and find beauty in it.

Thankfully I am embracing a good result.

Comments

67 responses to “The Poetry in the Faded Tulips”

  1. Rhonda

    Thank the Lord! I believe we’ve all had these scary moments at one time. Your experience with those two dogs seemed to me to be a walk with a fear and you conquered it. xo

    Reply
  2. pc Brown

    Oh mercy. I am happy to hear all is well, but sad that you had to go through the worry and concern.
    To lighten, I offer the following:
    Two years ago I went in for a 2nd brain scan. After a week or so I came home to a recording on the phone- “This is Amy from Such-n-Such Imaging for Dr. WhooseyDoosey regarding your Brain Scan. The technician and both of the Dr.s have all reviewed your scan and wish to inform you that your brain was clear, there is absolutely nothing there, repeating, there is nothing on the brain scan, your brain is clear. If you have any further questions, your follow up is on the 10th at 2:15.”
    My husband looked at me and very seriously said, “Well, there we are. We have documented medical proof that there is absolutely nothing in your head.”
    Hoping and praying that all your future scares end as silly as mine did.

    Reply
  3. Star

    So, so glad to hear you are well, Corey.
    There have been so many acquaintances who have been facing the serious disease and illness recently; I am so sick of hearing the C word. Thank you for the reminder not to let discouraging thoughts creep in where there is no cause.
    How is Mr. Espresso’s father? He remains in my prayers (as do you and your family).

    Reply
  4. Jennifer Sylva

    Sending love from San Francisco!

    Reply
  5. carol

    Oh, Corey, I’m so glad you are ok and can truly imagine how frightened you were! Yann’s look and fading tulips, beautiful.
    I’ve been back in treatment for a few months. No fun, as you would understand.
    Yes, how is Mr.E’s father doing?

    Reply
  6. Helene

    I am so glad your test results were good. What an interesting series of events: the walk with the dogs and your wonderful effort of turning your fear into a positive affirmation of being guided by divinity.
    We all have these moments of waiting and trying to suppress the fear or negative thoughts. I want to recommend a book but really I am recommending the author and her wonderful story and what she offers the world today. Her name is Anita Moorjani and the book is “Dying to be Me”. It is the story of her brush with death and what she has learned from that. She travels the world now inspiring people and teaching of the divine power we have within us. She has a wonderful website and is supported by such luminaries as Wayne Dwyer and Louise Hay. My own momentary contact with her helped me to dissolve a very painful tumor that I had and in the process learn much about myself.

    Reply
  7. carol

    So thankful you received good results. Your words so beautifully described what all of us feel when in that situation. What a gift when we can embrace the joy and beauty of each moment.:)

    Reply
  8. nancy w

    Smiling with your good news.

    Reply
  9. Julie Loeschke

    God is good.Remember the dogs.

    Reply
  10. WR

    Stay well my friend.

    Reply
  11. g

    Corey – I always mention you in my prayers – as I do the entire tongue and cheek community-I am so happy to hear your news-a little breathless but happy-I know your feelings well and I am super fantastic at the pile on….I am my own worst enemy -the insight in today’s post is a lesson for all….so happy and continued good and strong and peaceful thoughts and prayers on this day and all days….

    Reply
  12. Penny

    A relief to come to such good news, Corey. We count our blessings, day by day, sometimes by the hour, don’t we? Rest.

    Reply
  13. Debbie

    Corey I am grateful your results are good. And G – how touched I was to read your comment about keeping the whole tongue and cheek community in prayer. I am reminded by both of you to do the same. Thank you for reminding me what’s really important.

    Reply
  14. George in Brooklyn

    Glad to hear all is well.

    Reply
  15. Tongue in Cheek

    I count on your prayers!!!

    Reply
  16. freefalling

    Phew.

    Reply
  17. Alena

    So glad everything is OK!!!!
    Beautiful Tongue in Cheek community!!

    Reply
  18. jackie

    xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxooxxooxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxooxoxoxoxooxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo
    tell me if you need more:)
    J-

    Reply
  19. jend’isère

    Those Gothic images zapped the tulips’ energy to your soul! May the bouquet flourish!

    Reply
  20. Sharon Penney-Morrison

    All we have is today. I understand your fear. Happy for your good news. I very much dislike the days when I think about mortality. When I met you I was 66…I turned 70 in Dec. and I spent the whole month thinking about my mortality. I just hate that!! A whole month!
    I am not thinking about that anymore. I did not enjoy.
    love, love

    Reply
  21. gail

    So thankful you got good news!

    Reply
  22. Ann

    So glad you got a good report. A reminder how fragile life is. Hugs and sending you a virtual flower ~*~ to cheer you and prayers for a joyful and peaceful heart.

    Reply
  23. carol

    Thank you, g! You mentioned praying for me before, but I’m very touched by your prayers for all of us in this community and will join you too. What mighty things prayer can accomplish!

    Reply
  24. pmj

    Thank heavens!!!!!!!!!!

    Reply
  25. Lana Kloch

    french husband and you are in sync. he understands the preciousness of the changing flowers.
    the test is askew; the flowers are purchased… your fears re-emerge as you are asked to be re-tested..
    what now? as the days pass for the results.. everything is turmoil and you ask what if?
    there are markers in life that shake us and remind us to “be”.
    in this case… a positive result.. what a relief! and the spent flowers mark another milestone.
    i love you corey; i am also relieved w/ the result. i had no idea that you went through ovarian cancer and you are a survivor. i will not take you for granted.
    sending hugs and bises..
    lana cano kloch

    Reply
  26. Robyn

    I don’t think the fear ever goes away. I know how you were feeling and it is such a relief to get the results back xoxo

    Reply
  27. Leslie in Oregon

    More good news from Corey. I rejoice with you!

    Reply
  28. Kathleen

    Amen! Great to get good news and breathe a sigh of relief,life is beautiful again!

    Reply
  29. Barb

    So glad things are better! And thank you for sharing your life with us! You are such a ray of sunshine….

    Reply
  30. 24/7 in France

    Happy to hear all is well, Corey, and wishing you continued health & happiness!

    Reply
  31. Tongue in Cheek

    Hi Rhonda, so true… that walk was more in than conquering the fear of dogs.

    Reply
  32. Tongue in Cheek

    lol, humor helps, truly helps! Glad you are okay.

    Reply
  33. Tongue in Cheek

    Thank you!
    Mr. Espresso’s, Jean Luc is doing as well as he can. He is home now, and starting the healing process. He thanks you, all of you for the cards, prayers and support!

    Reply
  34. Tongue in Cheek

    thank you!!

    Reply
  35. Tongue in Cheek

    Oh Carol I am sorry to hear that you are back in treatment. I will continue to pray for you. Jean Luc is pushing forward, he is home now recuperating.

    Reply
  36. Tongue in Cheek

    Thank you. I went on Amazon and ordered it. The reviews are as you say. Thank you for telling me about it. http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1401937535/ref=as_li_qf_sp_asin_il_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=9325&creativeASIN=1401937535&linkCode=as2&tag=tongueinche04-20&linkId=BSOQBMWBZCLOLM2F

    Reply
  37. Tongue in Cheek

    I try.

    Reply
  38. Tongue in Cheek

    Penny exactly that. Exactly!

    Reply
  39. Tongue in Cheek

    Hi Debbie, G is a champion of friendship. I feel I know her, one day I will!!

    Reply
  40. Tongue in Cheek

    lol! More is always accepted!

    Reply
  41. Tongue in Cheek

    I love your words!

    Reply
  42. Tongue in Cheek

    Sharon you do not look 70! You are a bright star!

    Reply
  43. Tongue in Cheek

    Oh dear Lana thank you. You amaze me tooxx

    Reply
  44. Tongue in Cheek

    True. it is always there waiting to be fed. I hope I don’t have to look at it ever!

    Reply
  45. Tongue in Cheek

    Good to see you!! xoxox

    Reply
  46. Rose

    Corey, happy too that you are well. Your dog story has stayed with me since I read it. I am a lover of all dogs but at same time could feel your concerns about your encounter. Thank you for sharing…all the dogs of my lifetime and now yours walk with me.
    ~Rose xoxo

    Reply
  47. Suzanne

    So happy for your good news, Corey!
    I love how you write and portray your feelings to us…it’s as if we are in the room, hearing you speak. It goes right to my heart!
    May this new year bring you the very best that life has to offer.

    Reply
  48. Mardog

    Happy to hear the results. Sending love + hugs. And a big glass of wine.

    Reply
  49. Pam Norwood

    His eye is on the sparrow…..so glad you are well darlin.;)

    Reply
  50. SusieQ

    Corey, my friend, I’m sorry you have had this scare, but thrilled that the end result is positive. I, myself, am a cancer survivor ( 24 years since my breast cancer) and know I am one of the very lucky ones. They say that once you have had cancer, you are always fighting it in your mind and soul. I can’t go to the doctor for even the hiccups without feeling anxious that something will be wrong. So, let’s rejoice with the good news and live each day to the fullest. Sending you a huge, warm hug and one for Yann too.

    Reply
  51. Judyo

    Corey, I am so glad the results were good! I know that feeling you had while waiting. Carpe Diem!❤️

    Reply
  52. Irene Thomas

    Wonderful news, Corey. Your “spirit guides” walked with you yesterday.

    Reply
  53. Camy

    Corey…we are so relieved to hear that you are okay. Well not just okay but doing well. You are such an inspiration!

    Reply
  54. Sharon Penney-Morrison

    xo too kind.

    Reply
  55. Linda P.

    I’m just catching up and wanted to join others in expressing my relief that all was well. How tough to go through those weeks of waiting, however.

    Reply
  56. carol

    Thank you, dear Corey!

    Reply
  57. Bonnie Gale

    I share your relief the test results are good. By sharing your story, you also shared the gift the experience bestowed on you. Miracles are in the shift of perception, not necessarily in the outward experience. We all can carry that message with us. I need to be reminded everyday. Thank you.

    Reply
  58. Star

    Corey – I’ve read about this woman several places online over the last few years. I will look forward to your take on what she has to say (if you decide to share here). Not sure what to believe when it comes to these experiences.

    Reply
  59. Star

    This warms my heart. I have restructured my prayer life this calendar year and am liking the change (the sincerity has always been there, but it often breathes new life into old practices when you make a change).
    Thank you for your prayers

    Reply
  60. Thomas Ed Cole

    Blessings All and prayers precious child of God!!

    Reply
  61. monika

    Corey, you are so beautiful. Inside and out.
    I am so grateful that the results are good — you bring so much to so many.
    I know how it feels — I’m always scared when I have to have tests. The times the results have been bad never go away, and my condition is considered precancerous, and so the danger is always there. Right now, I have two friends dying of cancer… it could be me. I feel like I am slipping through the health care system cracks here — never got test results from last year, never got the results for my apnea test. In Switzerland I was so well cared for by my doctors… Here, I have to fight for attention; fighting is so tiring

    Reply
  62. Marilyn

    Whew! So happy it was good results.
    There is indeed beauty all around us when we notice, even
    in the fading tulips. Breathe!

    Reply
  63. Terri

    Don’t ever give up. Know God is with you, he saved you once, he will save you again. Just keep up with your appointments. I have a chronic leukemia which will never be cured but am in remission at the moment. I was stage 4 and prayed for God to save me if it was his will. He did & he will save you, too. Believe in the power of prayer. It works! (sorry, don’t mean to get too religious on you but I love to tell everyone of God’s good grace.)

    Reply
  64. Debra

    THANK GOD!!! xoxo

    Reply
  65. Susan

    “Flowers fade. Beauty remains” I love this line.
    I am echoing those above. Thanks be to God for the gifts He gives, especially health and joy!

    Reply
  66. Jeanne

    I am happy to hear all the results were good and positive.
    Blessings for you always of good health, love and continued beauty in your life.
    Love Jeanne

    Reply
  67. Ycha

    Thinking of you with love and smiles.

    Reply

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