Stories Collected While Living in France

French la Vie

It Takes a Village

 

A baby's cry always gets my attention. Their cries alert the mother in me: Where is the baby? Why is the baby crying? Is there an adult caring for the baby? Is the baby being abused?

Such was the case the other day in the grocery store. A mother was pushing her crying baby in a stroller. The crying baby was looking at his mother while moving his hands upward. The mother tried to put the pacifier in his mouth to no avail; she bought her groceries while the baby cried steadily. 

I wanted to pick the baby up, and it seemed he wanted to be held by the way he was looking at her. Mind you; I could never let my babies cry. For me, a crying baby is trying to communicate something, and I believed it was my role as a mother to figure out the message and respond. At one point, the mother left her baby in the stroller with her daughter to watch over while she raced to get something around the corner of the busy grocery store. The daughter shook the stroller as her mother showed her, but the baby wailed even louder.

The second the mother left, several other women instantly gathered around. Some cooed, others touched the baby's feet, and others made playful faces, each offering a moment of motherly love, tenderness, and a way to settle the baby. I grabbed my camera because it struck me how I wasn't the only one wanting to help. I dared not go over as the other women did because the "Cautious Me" thought it wasn't my place, the baby wasn't my baby, that the mother wasn't doing anything wrong, and that the baby wanted to be held, but I could not pick up the baby. I was relieved when the other women gathered around, offering what they could; their caring made me smile at humanity. It showed me that my feelings were shared and that even if the "Cautious-Me" could not make a move, they did. Their tender giving was loving-kindness.  

When the mother returned, the other women smiled, stepped aside, and reassured her that they could understand how it felt to be a mother with a crying baby in a grocery store. The mother seemed to melt from their understanding; her tense shoulders lowered, and she took the baby out of the stroller and held him close; she rocked him while the other women smiled, talked, and continued cooing. 

A sweeter moment than the melon I was buying for lunch.

It made the expression, "It takes a village," come alive.

 

 

 

Comments

14 responses to “It Takes a Village”

  1. lanmangina@me.com

    So endearing! I would have been there with you wanting to pick up the baby.
    I can’t wait to see you! xox

    Reply
  2. Kim

    Lovely story. I can’t resist a crying baby, either. It cuts right to my heart.

    Reply
  3. Wendy in Kennewick

    Beautiful story, not only of comforting the baby, but also comforting the mom.

    Reply
  4. Paulita

    What a sweet story. I can feel for the mother too. There was a time once, at the end of a very long vacation, when my two-year-old just wanted to be held by me, no one else, and I was too tired to pick him up. I finally sat down on a bench in Monet’s Garden and just held him. That’s how it is with kids, right? You put aside the things you want to get done. And I cringe now thinking that I didn’t do this sooner.

    Reply
  5. Taste of France

    That is lovely. That more people show understanding for crying babies and crying little children, who often are just hungry, tired or uncomfortable, but not able to say that.

    Reply
  6. pc Brown

    This story makes me long for the days when, as women, we *could* go over and just pick up the baby*. Gosh a crying baby. What is worse? For every parent in the world there is that pain at not knowing why they are crying or how to sooth them, you just ache at wanting a baby to feel secure and happy. It’s not the noise that makes people jittery, it’s the not being able to help the baby. Poor momma, and 36 points to each person who tried to help out!
    *I remember when our first was born. Normally he was a happy baby and easily comforted, but one Sunday at church he just went off and nothing I or my husband could do would help. An older woman didn’t say a thing, she just got out of her seat, walked over to me and took him out of my arms in a loving way and walked to the back nuzzling him in her neck and mumble things to him. After about 3-4 minutes he was back to happy. She cared for him a bit longer, then at the end of the service she brought him back and placed him in my arms and said, “Sometimes they just need a vacation like we all do. I’m glad I was his beach today, thanks.” I’ll never forget that.

    Reply
  7. robin williams

    You spoke for all mothers everywhere. Chap is visiting this Saturday. We are off to our farm for lunch with other cousins where we will be”mothering” left and right. Fun time to reconnect. Don’t forget to look for a match striker for me! Robin

    Reply
  8. Momof5

    That is key isn’t it.? When the mom was comforted she was able to see her baby’s distress and pick him(her?) up. Lovely story.

    Reply
  9. Marilyn M

    Women can save the world. They do it every day.

    Reply
  10. Leslie in Oregon

    Thank you for a moving story of compassion and comfort extended to a baby and to its mother. As such, it is a story that gives me hope for the survival of the human species in these extremely troubled times.

    Reply
  11. Nikki

    I love your story and picture Corey and also the above quote by Marilyn M..what if all the women of the world were given a chance to rule the nations, using weapons of love and compassion to combat hatred and fear.

    Reply
  12. Sue J.

    Amen.

    Reply
  13. Kristin

    Although the days of mothering a small child are nearly 40 years away for me, I too, feel that urge to comfort the child and ask the mom if she would like a bit of help while she shopped…mothers, grandmothers, aunts, sisters, cousins and strangers all can respond to that child without words to tell what they are needing…and yes, oh yes, the beauty of the gift those women all gave to the mother, perhaps, the greatest gift of all. She was comforted in her distress at not being able to easily manage everything…yes, the village of caring, helpful folks…beautiful, wonderful story.

    Reply
  14. Linda

    Open hearts make everything better. Those women did so much more than comfort that mother and child. They made time for them.

    Reply

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