The Man Digging Through the Garbage at the Train Station

portrait French la vie

 

 

 

A homeless man rummaged through the garbage at the train station, he found a coffee cup that someone had thrown away he opened it to find it empty. He gently put it back in the garbage then turned around not looking at anyone he was smiling. He stood and watched the crowd seemingly entertained I assumed he was mentally challenged by his movements and actions I wondered what his life must have been to be rummaging through the garbage and not asking for money. I approached him, tapped him on his shoulder and asked him if he would like a coffee, he shook his head yes. I gave him some Euros and he walked over to the coffee machine dispenser. His sincerity struck me: the man was hungry, not begging, admiring people, smiling even though he had little- holey shoes, worn coat, unshaven- he was in need and nobody noticed him despite the fact that his soft-spoken eyes took in everyone.

I felt spoiled and fortunate. Grateful and sad. Conversations rattled with questions, proclamations, at the speed of light through my mind and heart: What is life all about? Why him and not me? Why am I so lucky to be born by loving parents, brought up in a safe environment, and not him? What is this all about? And God, or and this Energetic Force of incredible life and love that I believe in what is the point of this? Food wasted, lives wasted, richness, division, reality stupid TV, barriers, a man digging through the garbage at a train station with at least several hundred people who have full bellies, warm clothes, do not stink of urine, have beds to sleep in without a threat of bombs or fear standby. 

I turned around and went back to talk to the man, but he did not have words, just a smile.

 

 

 

portrait French la vie

 

 

I asked, "Are you hungry?" He shook his head yes. I asked him to follow me to a cafe counter which had food ready-made, "Please pick something to eat and I will pay for it." Slowly, he studied each plate of food. Hesitated with uncertainty was it over preference? I could hear the expression, "Beggars cannot be choosers." How sad. I said to him if you want more than one plate that is fine with me.

He chose pasta with chicken. I pointed to the desserts, "Would you like a dessert?" He shook his head  and selected yogurt with fruit.

We walked together to the checkout counter and I handed him money that was enough to buy what he had in hand plus dinner and breakfast the next day if he wanted. He was surprised. I said, "Bon Appetit," and walked away.

Am I a good person simply because I extended myself to someone in need? Maybe, but not a Superhero or worthy of a Nobel prize for generosity, it was a small gesture that took a few minutes of my time, and gave a hint of a respite for him. Nothing more than doing the right thing because I could. A few moments of my hours of good fortune and comfort and only a full belly for him for a few hours.

 

Life is unfair. And more so when the players think it is fair that their God might be handing blessings to some and not others. Or some sort of karma thing, "what goes around comes around." I have always had a problem with that. To me, that seems like a calculated love, a childish reasoning, "If I am good I will get a candy blessing and if I am bad I will not have one." If that is how it works it isn't challenging to love deeper, but to aim for a reward. That isn't love to me, that is only selfishness disguising as love.

The man who was digging was searching for his meal, how many times have I walked on by not extending myself to the person in need. How many times have I justified my actions with judgemental words that seem to make my not doing something acceptable?

His gentle smile spoke of his acceptance or ignorance… either way it is a life so very different from the comfortable one I have. It woke me up to his need.

 

 

portrait French la vie

 

"I see the world being slowly transformed into a wilderness; I hear the approaching thunder that, one day, will destroy us too. I feel the suffering of millions. And yet, when I look up at the sky, I somehow feel that everything will change for the better, that this cruelty too shall end, that peace and tranquility will return once more." 

 Anne Frank

A step in a good direction, his direction was needed. Even if it was one step. It was at least a step forward. 

In the wake of the suffering we see happening around us, we wonder what we can do, how we can give, how can we really help when the need is vast, endless and beyond our scope. The story of Mother Theresa comes to mind:

 
Mother Therese was feeding a starving dying baby in India while reporters pestered her with comments such as: "You cannot save the dying, you are only one person, look at you only caring for one baby in the sea of many dying people. What is that you are doing…" and as they threw their frustrating demanding, insulting doubts towards her, Mother Therese focused on the baby in her arms, "Look how he takes the bottle, look how he looks in my eyes, look how he is eating…"
 
Love is taking what we have and doing something to help someone. 

Mother Theresa focused on hope she stood in the sea of suffering doing what she could:

A small stone cast caused ripples. Those ripples went forth regardless on where they would run.

Casting our stone is a daily choice.

 

 

 

To live is to suffer, to survive is to find some meaning in the suffering.

 

To live is to suffer, to survive is to find some meaning in the suffering.

Friedrich Nietzsche

"Whatsoever you do to the least of my brothers/sisters so you do unto me…"

And who is me? Who is God?

You. Him. Her. The man digging through the garbage for something to eat, the immigrant, the refugee, the person of a different race, color, faith, the air we breathe, the link that connects us all, the source of love, the thread that holds us because we are one.

We are God and God is us. Today I shared with God and he gave me his hand to hold and I felt strengthened by his smile.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 



Comments

42 responses to “The Man Digging Through the Garbage at the Train Station”

  1. Corey, your posting today comes through as a heartfelt, honest and timely message. I’ve been feeling the same recently, as life has picked up its pace, as death becomes closer and closer as we in the middle age really start to feel like getting older and older. In the meantime we see the good, we see the senseless, and it really does challenge one to think. Does God exist? If so, why the suffering and the injustice? Why, also, only to grant us the privileges and the pleasures, only to punctate it in ourselves in others, sufferings, hardworking, and challenges? Do we deserve more? Do we deserve less? At the end, we all will die, so maybe that is really the great equalizer and none of this life really matters. Yesterday, I had a strange perception that everything that we call ‘reality’ is actually a perception, a lesson, given to us. We might think we experience certain things, but in fact, this is not the real world, but to each one of us, an individual ‘lesson plan’ given to us, with a unique curriculum that includes ‘perceptions’ of other people’s realities. I remember seeing my patients at their last breath. When the soul leaves the body, the body is entirely vacant, like a shell that has been left on the beach head. The person is gone. But gone to where? Where the did person go. And where did the person come from? Why are we here? Someone once told me, ‘Don’t worry about anything. When you were in the womb, you didn’t even have a nose, and you were not worried!’ Anyway, sorry for being reflective today (hey, I can blame it on your post). Thanks for writing this post, as it makes me feel las if others are feeling/thinking/sensing similar questions about life.

  2. Interesting comment Joanna.
    Corey, your story reminded me of this video I recently saw about a young woman helping others. https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=1&v=xATsJijzVNo

  3. Such a lovely thing to do, Corey. I haven’t visited your blog in many years, but your content and lovely generous spirit has not changed.

  4. I remember having a similar question as I worked with street kids in Sao Paulo Brazil, “Why had I been born to a life of privilege and not them?” And a small voice came back, “You were born so that you could come and help these children.”
    I often, very often, feel overwhelmed with the pain, evil and hatred of the world, but daily I ask God to help me see the world with God’s eyes and to reach and love whoever is put in my path.

  5. Tami in NC

    Corey,
    I’ve been reading your blog forever, but this is my first time commenting. Your post today was just so touching! I had the “ whatsoever you do” hymn running through my head, so your words were so timely! I too, am wondering what has happened to compassion for others less fortunate. I believe in God but am not a church-goer. I took my mom to her church a few weeks ago and I was shocked at the political comments I heard throughout the service. These are all people that I would consider very nice people. i guess you never really know what someone is thinking on the inside. It’s so depressing! Have you seen the art project by Ai Weiwei that shows the human figures in the huge inflatable life raft? All the adults are sitting around the edges with the babies and children in the middle. It is so haunting to look at! He says “there’s no refugee crisis, only a human crisis” and he is so right!! It seems like there is no tolerance for people unlike ourselves. But we are all the same – human!

  6. Squirrel Hill was Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood in real life, and what his mother famously told him about encountering scary events — advice most recently revived in Pittsburgh following the Tree of Life synagogue massacre — is relevant in your case, too:
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-LGHtc_D328
    For Steeler nation, see also:
    https://twitter.com/macky_neal/status/1056332443022712832/photo/1

  7. I appreciate all you’ve shared here, Corey.
    I often see things from the other side…the petty, jealous side. It hasn’t always been so, but more these last few years. Wondering why the health challenges, why a disfunctional birth family that presents more challenges as the years pass, why the workplace stressors. After years of moving forward and making due and looking the other way and smiling in the face of adversity, I have grown weary. I am not proud of this; quite the opposite.
    For me, at least, I think it is the world around us that has created an atmosphere of despair, a dimming of the hope that used to buoy our spirits amid these trials. So much tragedy, so many lives lost, so much negativity. And, as you say, so many questions about where our Higher Power fits in all of it.
    I love coming here to spend time in your virtual presence. I love your family as my own. It gives me such joy each time I see the wedding pictures and video of Chelsea and Martin. I am filled with pride at how Sacha is striking out on his own and chuckle at the things he shares on IG. I pray for Yann’s safety as he makes this Indian dream a reality. While the brocante does not call my own name, I still revel in your pleasure at finding hidden treasures.
    You have a kind and caring spirit, Corey. May we all keep the faith until the answers we seek are revealed.

  8. God bless you Corey for your kindness. I went to a memorial service yesterday for a man who often seemed like a no nonsense hard working man and rarely let others see his soft side unless he was talking about his family. The man giving the eulogy reminded all of us about the homeless alcoholic the man befriended years ago. The man being eulogized made sure the man had a warm place to stay, had food and clothing and medical care as needed. This went on for many years. My perceptions in my youth of the alcoholic man were of his nasty comments and the smell of urine and filth and avoiding him. What the man saw was someone who would have died if he hadn’t helped him. He took care of him not because he wanted praise but because he saw another human in need. Our friend was a man with a good education, highly respected professnal with s great family. He had no reason to help the man , but he did. Just like you and the man at the train station.
    Whenever my father came across someone with a medical or emotional disability he told me he would often remind himself “There but for the grace of God, go I”. Perhaps my friend felt the same way.

  9. Thank you, Corey! So beautifully spoken. As a Quaker I am reminded that God is in each of us, it doesn’t matter who we are. As a young girl I am reminded that my mom struggle with having enough money to keep her little family together (my father deserted her when I was 2 and she was pregnant with my sister). Our power was going to be turned off and I was worrying about it. Someone in our church brought us the money to pay the bill and said instead of paying them back to pay it forward. I have always remembered that and it was such an impact on me. I just wish I could do more than I do.

  10. Corey, the world is a better place with you in it. It’s all down to empathy, and realizing that one’s fortunate situation can be down to the randomness of the universe. Hugs to you for your kindness.

  11. That event was traumatizing for the soul of any decent person. Kathie thank you for these links.

  12. Marilyn M

    You make the world a better place. Thank you.

  13. Excellent post, Corey. Thank you.

  14. Judi Delgado

    Corey, what a wonderful post this is! How well you write. How well you live. How timely to be thinking these thoughts and acting in this way. Your actions simply came from who you are in your soul. Natural and unforced. The very definition of grace. Thank you.

  15. Taste of France

    You have expressed my worry about the trend toward self-congratulation. That one is rich by dint of hard work, and not because of inheritance or because of laws that allow one to operate a business that relies on paying people too little to live on. I don’t see it changing soon, because the idea that regulation is bad seems to be the current gospel, even among those who are being underpaod, drinking unfitnwater and breathing dirty air.
    I often wonder about the homeless in France. Certainly there are the sans-papiers, who lack access to government services, but it seems that overall the French government is pretty generous with aid for those in need. How does someone like this man fall through the cracks of this safety net I am happy to fund with my taxes?
    Thank you for sharing this story and reminding us that even if we can’t change the world, we can make someone’s life better, if only for a day.

  16. This post deeply touched my heart.
    Thank you for sharing.
    I love you
    Keep shining your beautiful light the world needs it.
    Love Jeanne

  17. Thank you for sharing this story…truly a teaching moment and a reminder of how we should all consider our responses to others in need….sometimes it just takes a little courage to step out of our comfort zone to do a right thing in any given situation….thank you for your example…let us all be a pebble in the pond….

  18. Sixty Bricks

    So well articulated Corey. Thanks for the reminder.

  19. A great reminder to us all

  20. You transcribed the persistent monologue that I have had in my brain for years…thank you for laying it out…your heart of gold illuminates what we struggle with on a daily basis.
    The only answer I have is for the question “why me?”…I uttered that question forty years ago when my baby girl, christened with my tears moments before going into brain surgery at seven days old…I repeatedly cried out, why me? The answer that soothed me came from my husband’s lips….”why anyone else?” I revisit that answer daily as I try to understand why her suffering of forty years has gotten worse…”why anyone else?”….nothing special about my pain, only it is mine.
    Carry on your light…and through it your loving heart…

  21. This is without doubt the best post you have ever written. Thank you for sharing this story, these thoughts. They will stay with me, always.

  22. Well said.

  23. Beautiful post.

  24. I shall take your husband’s wisdom and words with me forever…so true-and thank you for sharing –

  25. debra phillips

    blessings to you
    debra

  26. we have to have a heart that sees and eyes that see too-I just asked my aunt DON”T PEOPLE SEE?-and she boldly said NO THEY DO NOT….first the seeing, then the doing– to see and do nothing….I can never understand-in the end we can only put our drop in the bucket our stone tossed creating a ripple-you cannot make people care-you can only lead by example-over and over again and no trumpet blaring needs to announce the action or praise or accolade– no karma— no payback just doing your something no matter the size BECAUSE IT IS THE RIGHT THING– THE COMPASSIONATE THING– THE LOVING THING TO DO…even if no one else sees-creating that ripple should be a daily goal– giving out of excess is good giving/doing out of need is the miraculous-the truly altruistic act because there is nothing to be gained in doing so-just my two cents

  27. wyowhites

    Come home to America. We need you. We are ripped worn and tearful. The past 2 years have been a nightmare of horrible smears hate and lies. It is hard to hold one’s head up as an American. Our refugees have their final hearing 12/11 and pray not to be sent home to their “shit hole country”. We still hope for compassion and refuge for them but times are bleak and ICE still hold their passports. We pray without ceasing but it still feels like Europe in 1938-bitter and unwelcoming. All of us have friends in Squirrel Hill with broken hearts. How will we make these desperate wrongs right. Our leader does not want to be a follower of peace.

  28. Chico Sue

    What a lovely day you had Corey. As you fed the hungry man, he fed you. Look how many comments you elicited with the tale of your good deed, and I have no doubt that you have sown more seeds of future generosity in its telling as well. A lovely, blessed day for all.

  29. Beautiful. Thank you for showing so much kindness and thoughtfulness.

  30. Sharon CrigSt

    Beautiful post filled with truth and challenges for each of us. Bless you and your heart for listening to God and reaching out to this man. We all need to do this more. Have a wonderful day! ❤️

  31. Barbara Kelly

    Your best blog post! Love and Kindness is a daily practice which you do so well!

  32. And thank you for your concern, Diogenes. It’s been a heart-breaking time here.

  33. I’ve thought a lot about ‘what goes around, comes around’. Put a different spin on it – maybe that man had been very kind to someone in need and you giving him money for food during his time of need is not about you. It’s about what he gave coming back to him. It’s such a humbling thought. That’s how I’ve been trying to think about those ‘random acts of kindness’. I’m the instrument helping to pass out those rewards for random acts of kindness that someone has done. I’ll be getting no reward for what I’m doing. I’m only an Instrument of God’s Will.
    And don’t I sound like I’m experiencing the Sin of Pride? I just don’t know how to express myself without sounding like a Pharisee. Please don’t misunderstand me. Like I said – I’m just trying to look at things in a little bit different way.

  34. jend’isère

    Thank you for painting with words the portrait of too many in the world, who struggle to survive. A canvas representing their faces are never framed in gold.

  35. Such a beautiful post, Corey. It brought me back to my few days in Denver for a conference a year or so ago. One of my favorite things to do when I eat out is to buy extra meals to hand out to the homeless on my walks home. On the last night, my friend and I bought several extra meals and looked for takers on our way back to the hotel. My usual question was, “Are you hungry?” which would be met so often with a smile and a “Yes.” One young man in particular accepted our offerings and stood to talk with us for a bit. An old woman with a walker came by and the young man stopped her and asked, “Are you hungry?” When she said, “Yes, please,” he reached into our bag and handed her HIS meal and made sure she got the piece of chocolate cake. We stood with him until he had managed to find takers for all the food in our very large bag. His face was gentle and sweet and his heart was so loving. I was in awe of how he turned around our giving to benefit others. It was such a beautiful moment. Thank you for sharing your story today. xoxo

  36. Bless your heart!

  37. Paula Tyner

    Thank you posting, Corey. You give me hope.

  38. Paula Tyner

    Thank you for sharing such an exquisite moment.

  39. Amylia Grace Yeaman

    Makes me think of MLK Jr’s quote:
    Never, never be afraid to do what’s right, especially if the well-being of a person or animal is at stake. Society’s punishments are small compared to the wounds we inflict on our souls when we look the other way.
    -Martin Luther King, Jr.

  40. Paula, the experience still warms my heart. Thank you.

  41. what a wonderful writer and storyteller you are! Thank you.
    Kathy

  42. You truly understand the meaning of generosity. Your heart is brimming and you inspire me with your kindness and your ability to write so eloquently about your life. Thank you for this… One note. I am Buddhist. Karma is not that simple to understand… and rest assured that what you describe as karma is not what it truly is. 🙂
    Thank you for sharing this story!! XOXO

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