When you live in a foreign country rather than the one you know as home, certain things you expect will be different, unusual, and far from the norm of what you are accustomed to. Those big things like language, culture, food… those big things that are necessary to understand and help one to feel like they fit in. One doesn't expect to be thrown off by the little things such as how to open a door, toilet paper, signatures, handshakes, ice cubes, you know, the little things that you don't expect to be different but are and catch you off guard the first time you encounter them.
When you live in a foreign country, you will learn the language, learn about the culture, cook their food, sing their songs, and eventually laugh at their jokes. But when you first live in a foreign country, you will miss the most minor things from back home the most. The things I missed were so silly I could hardly tell you. Let's say you will miss the little stuff because it is easier to cope with than feeling homesick because you aren't there for a parent's birthday, a niece's birth, your best friend's wedding, or any of the unending list of important dates that will come every month for the rest of your life abroad.
When you live in a foreign country, your mother tongue sounds like music. When you hear someone speaking your language, your words will race out, "Hello, where are you from?" Perfect strangers seem like your new best friends. You have much in common without even knowing the person's name.
You wonder why you don't meet more people when you are back home… everyone there speaks your tongue?
Then after years of living in a foreign country, you realize you have two places called home. You look around, and the foreign place doesn't feel so foreign. The doors that were closed to you before have opened over time, and the homesickness feels so common you think of it as a bruise that won't go away, and you have learned how to protect it.
Living in a foreign country makes the keys to your new life seem strange. The keys to any door at first feel awkward to use. Then one day, you realize that the passage is just part of the journey and every nook, cranny, door, and key has brought you to another place within yourself.
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Thank you for your emails, comments, support notes, encouragement, and prayers for Brian's family. I am very grateful for your caring and love.
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