2009
When Corey asked us to be guest writers for her blog,
I knew I wanted to give it my best and make it something worth reading.
I have followed her for years it seems, maybe 20 it's hard to remember
when I first saw her beautiful photos and words in Romantic Homes magazine.
When she wandered into my booth at Marburger Farms Antique Show in Round Top Texas
over 10 years ago, camera in hand, and made a comment about how lovely our things were
I looked up to find I recognized her name on her name tag she had a press pass
and was taking a look at all the booths set up. I was STAR stuck instantly.
I was meeting someone who I greatly admired and she LIKED what I was doing in our booth
WOW.
We connected instantly and over the next 10 years developed a cherished friendship.
With that said what oh what do I have to offer for her blog?
I have sat on this for a few days, over and over the word, "authenticity" has come to mind.
It’s something I look for in all things, antiques, fabrics, places, but it’s most important
to me when it involves the people I’m friends with, the connections that I nurture.
Somewhere in the ’70s, I became aware that I and most women I knew
tried to fit into categories, so many of us didn’t seem to fit anywhere.
I for one was very lost… I was divorced, with two children to raise could I be a party girl too?
Not so much-
could I be a good mother and take my children to church?
No turned out I had a conflict with that concept as well.
Could I play the swinging cool independent single chick part?
No that was not me.
Linda with her grandsons.
Linda with her granddaughter and daughter
Linda and her husband Ludimil
I wanted a home, a family, a husband… so who was I? Who was at my core?
What did I want to show the world, what did I want to hide?
Turns out it took me the whole 70’s and 80’s decade to really form that person
and develop her into an authentic, open, honest person. Lots of therapy, books,
seminars… workshops… I once in this period described myself as a “self-help junkie”!
I don’t think I’m very different from a lot of women in my generation,
actually, in any generation, women it seems to me have struggled with identity for eons.
What I do know is that it is a struggle to offer yourself to friends and family
as an authentic person.
You will meet disapproval, judgment, and conflict.
But for me, it was more of a struggle to “act right” for the others around me.
I had to choose, I choose ME.
The term “act right” came from my mother I hardly know a woman, including my daughter
who doesn’t have a mother issue (a whole volume of writing). I probably began my journey
of authenticity with my mother it did not end well, we shall leave it there.
What was accomplished was my awareness of who I actually was, what I liked, what I stood for,
what I could not or would not tolerate, what I had a passion for, what kinds of people,
places, and things brought me joy, what I needed to let go of. What I need to work on,
where I needed to face myself in the mirror and do my own judging, and bring about the changes when I
recognized the parts in me that needed changing. I learned that in spite of being more direct,
more honest with others, more open, that I had richer, more intimate, and yes authentic friendships
that now have been a part of my life for decades. I don’t want to give the impression that this
has been all a straight-line journey of perpetual growth and improvement it has not.
I have ducked when it got too hard I’ve been criticized, misunderstood,
I’ve stumbled and tripped myself up plenty.
I still do to some extent but I have not regretted making those first steps no matter how awkward, and
hesitant they were
to become more of who I am,
what I think,
what I believe,
and what I stand for.
In my friendships with women, I try to encourage that same path.
I honestly feel our lives will be enhanced, enriched, deeply, profoundly if we will allow
our true nature, thoughts, feelings, ideas, dreams, desires to be visible,
without shame or shyness
without worry about what people will think.
Check out Linda's book on Amazon:
Wardrobe Workshop: Take control of your closet and create a versatile wardrobe uniquely tailored to YOU
Leave a Reply