Stories Collected While Living in France

French la Vie

That Age Thing

My passport soon will expire to renew it means amongst other things that I need two identical photos of myself.

I took some.

None of them were appealing.

A prune came to mind.

Gasped!

Wrinkles. Like a roadmap, or
lines best in read in a book. 

Eyebrows doing the tango.

I will stop there.

I know the reasons and sayings about beauty,

ageing gracefully and how beauty is what is inside…

I know, I get it, I trust it, nevertheless-

Putting wisdom, gratitude for life and grace aside.

It is freaky this age thing.

The inner and outer me are facing each other.

Challenging me to see beyond the older physical person I see in the photograph.

I did not know that I looked that old.

Okay, I did. But an up-close photo made me understand why some people do botox and cosmetic surgery.

 

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Not my passport photo, blurred lines.

Comments

28 responses to “That Age Thing”

  1. Kathie B

    Oooh Corey, you sure hit a nerve. My recently-expired passport had a remarkably flattering photo of me from a decade ago — une femme d’un certain âge!
    Lately, however, I went to get new headshots taken, and I sure don’t recognize the old woman in them — even though I knew I needed to wear plenty of makeup so my main features (eyes, cheeks, lips) wouldn’t fade into my face.
    Maybe I’ll keep getting more photos taken, until there’s one I like. I doubt the State Department would let me use my flattering old one.

    Reply
  2. Jeanne

    You are beautiful just the way you are.
    Beautiful inside and out
    Love Jeanne

    Reply
  3. Kippy

    I renewed my passport a few years ago. The State Department rules regarding passport photos are you must not wear any makeup, no smiling, no glasses. Very uncomplementary. Who is that tired old lady with bags under her eyes?

    Reply
  4. Kathie B

    Kippy, the U.S. State Department allows makeup on women’s passport photos (obviously within reason, of course).

    Reply
  5. Kathie B

    Some people seem pathologically terrified of aging. I’m just grateful to have survived this long and still be productive.
    Have you ever seen this reverse video of how Cher might look if she’d never had “work” done on her face? I gather she’s a good person in many ways. But I’d rather live naturally than wind up like this:
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ymG9qBW2jYQ (video removing Cher’s many cosmetic procedures)

    Reply
  6. Nancy Doherty

    what the heck are you going thru girl! first the pet peeves and now the passport pic! I hope your feeling better and maybe getting it all out there will help. from my view you have a interesting face that shows the interesting life you have lead, wear it with honor!

    Reply
  7. Cousin Linda

    Wait till you have cataract surgery. You’ll never want to look in another mirror. Even the actors on TV are looking way more ancient. Everyone looked so much better through my filmy cataracts — a version of rose colored glasses. And anyone that tells me I look beautiful is either lying or they need cataract surgery.

    Reply
  8. Susan in Zurich

    My passport photo matches how I look in real life after an overnight flight back from the States!
    The rules about not smiling really don’t help. My swiss train pass photo is even *worse* than my passport picture!
    But Corey, I want to say, truly you look lovely. ❤️ What Jeanne said is so true, you are beautiful inside and out.

    Reply
  9. Sandra Schneider

    Oh Corey. I get this. I’m grateful to age. It is a privilege denied so many. I pray I’m aging gracefully. But sheesh. It’s still shocking.
    A friend told me that our photo image is backward to us, so it’s more shocking. I’m not sure about that. But I try to smile through it all.
    What else is to be done. Botox and surgery often look fake and desperate. So I’ll pass. (For now)
    I want my grandchildren to recognize me! 😂
    Keep your beautiful smile and wonderful attitude, friend.

    Reply
  10. Jennifer Phillipps

    The strange thing is when I look in the mirror without my glasses on the wrinkles seem to be less apparent, perhaps you have the same thing going on, then when I have to look in the magnifying mirror to tidy makeup or attend to those pesky little facial hairs that now pop up daily, since I did the menopause thing, I see that I actually look a little bit more wrinkly…not too bad for my 63 years, but spooky nevertheless! We are all in the same boat, so we best just keep rowing! You look fab to me! Jennie, NZ

    Reply
  11. Franki

    We used to be allowed to smile for US passport photos, and it made a real difference. We could look animated and like real people no matter what our age.

    Reply
  12. Darles

    It is a struggle for me too. The older women who seem to move beyond it and are visibly happy are my motivation as they carry a beauty no young person does. In many of your pictures, I see that woman.

    Reply
  13. g

    I think you are beautiful! and the photo above is also beautiful. Those official photos are the worst!

    Reply
  14. TracyH

    Have you ever looked at a recent picture that you didn’t realize had been taken and your brain is studying the people, real quick your brain sees you and goes “who is that?” seriously. 🤦‍♀️
    Like everyone else has said, you look fabulous Corey plus I like wrinkles from smiling your whole life!

    Reply
  15. Teddee Grace

    Selfies are just the worst. I’d do myself a favor and go to a studio. I’ve been thinking of getting a new studio photo before I get any older. 79 is just around the corner in March. I don’t know how much it would cost, but I think the boost to my self-esteem would be worth it.

    Reply
  16. Texasfrancophile

    Oh this is so interesting. My pals and i just had this conversation. I never smoked, what are those lines????? Aging gracefully is easy to say hard to do. Need to renew passport, global entry, TSA clear etc UGH. Hope you are cntinuing to feel better.

    Reply
  17. RebeccaNYC

    oh I hear you!! I actually took my own passport photos during the pandemic, and got perhaps the nicest photo I have ever had on my passport. But honestly, it looks nothing like me. When I see un-posed photos of myself I never recognize that person. When did I start looking like THAT?! I know I’m not supposed to care, that I am more than just my appearance, that aging is an honor…… but of course there is a part of me that cringes…I’m human.

    Reply
  18. Doreen

    I’m with your cousin Linda on this one, I had cataract surgery earlier in the year. I can’t see diddly squat in front of my face, but I can see a chickadee on a fence post six counties away. I have not allowed a photograph taken of me for over 25 years just because of the wrinkles. They sort of reminded me of those old shrunken apples that they made dolls out of. That was enough for me.

    Reply
  19. Barbara

    Corey: You are such a wise, deep, spiritual person who absorbs the joy and wonder of her grandchildren. It erases the wrinkles….I do understand though as I recently went to a spa to see what they could do with this inherited triple chin. Alas, it was nothing other than having plastic surgery, which I will not do. I find myself avoiding the mirror…You are beautiful!

    Reply
  20. Judy. “Aportmanteau”

    I quote a famous line: “Growing old ain’t for sissies.” Beyond a certain point, I think many of us begin to feel like sissies.

    Reply
  21. Diogenes

    Well half the problem is you took your own pictures. A tough thing to do. When I got my passport photo done, I knew I’d be stuck with it for a while. I went to a photographer who used a camera with a projection on a screen I could see, of exactly what the picture would be. So I could move around a little and adjusted things – lifted my chin, tilt my head, move the collar – all to improve the result, a big help for the overall look.

    Reply
  22. Kathy

    Dearest Corey,
    I so get it! I was hoping you’d share some secret French wrinkle-erase serum. 🙂 I have to admit my drawers have plenty of anti-aging products tucked inside. Every once in a while someone catches a candid photo of me and I actually think its ok. My favorite comment was when someone, after looking at a photo of me stated, ” You must have been drinking.” Well, I was not. If posing for a photo, well, forget it.
    However, in my eyes, you are filled with beauty both inside and out. In no way do I see what you see. You let your unique and lovely light shine out to the world and bless those around you. Thanks for blessing my life, friend. Sending love.

    Reply
  23. Val

    You are aging nicely! I know what you’re saying about getting old…Botox or plastic surgery I think makes a person look distorted.

    Reply
  24. Diogenes

    Corey
    A couple months ago I stumbled across this article and video about a makeup artist who uses facial tape to do transformations. Since this is sort of the topic, take a look, they are the same person:
    https://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-11469889/Catfisher-says-used-makeup-convince-internet-daughter-actually-her.html
    I wouldn’t do this myself, but it’s pretty crazy.

    Reply
  25. Anna

    You will always be a stunning beauty, Corey —- inside and out………… “Should you shield the canyons from the windstorms you would never see the true beauty of their carvings.”
    ELISABETH KUBLER-ROSS

    Reply
  26. marilyn

    Some days are harder than others to see my face in a picture or mirror.
    In the morning mirror I just make faces at me and the me in the mirror returns the favor.

    Reply
  27. Rhonda

    Well, I understand the struggle! My face does NOT match my body, especially after my surgery in 2017! In some ways, I am grateful but I believe it is more about how you feel. It’s good to be alive!! My suggestion is, always low lighting, ha!! Love ya, Corey, just the way you are. Beautiful, inside and out!

    Reply
  28. Shelley Noble

    Right there with you, Corey. It’s a stunning experience, this aging. And to not only transform physically, but to be listened to less or perceived to be of less importance to those who are currently younger. They can’t know how fast their time will come to experience this. How strange to become invisible whilst still alive.

    Reply

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